I am lost.

Lost in this gigantic, spherical figure we like to call the world.

I don't know who I am or where I am going, all i know is that I am constantly searching..

Searching for a purpose...

Searching for a meaning...

We live our lives nowadays in a consistent state of numbness. We go through the motions of the day... We eat, we congregate with our peers, then we sleep because we know that there will be other days..

In this constant state of searching I have come to realize that one day there will be no tomorrow. We are not immortal. Our lives will come to an end and at this end we will come to realize that we have wasted our lives. Wasted our lives with hate and jealousy... Wasted our lives wasting each individual day because we believe in this thing called tomorrow. The idea that the present day is not the rest of our lives.. in fact if we do not do something right now, we have all the time and a million other days to accomplish what we should be accomplishing at this very moment.

We live in a sense of tomorrow when we should be living in a sense of today... who cares what will happen tomorrow? Life is happening now, this very moment... and every second we lose one minuscule moment, one moment that may not seem like anything right now but in the end, it will seem like everything.

Perhaps we were all just born to die, and I don't want to sound somber however, like most things death is inevitable.

But with all this searching I have found a new perspective...

The perspective that we were all born to live, not die. We were born to live each day to its fullest potential and cherish every moment good or bad, because it is all sacred. Its life, and life flashes by in an instant, a millisecond...

I have lived 19 years. Nineteen years of good and bad... Of wondering, and searching, and negativity, and I am tired. I'm tired of this numbness and constant state of tomorrow and asking myself whether tomorrow will be a good day or bad day. Because tomorrow doesn't matter today, right now. And honestly so what if today is a bad day... Not every day can be exquisite and not every day will be horrible..

So..

So what if I am lost? I probably always will be, as will most of us, but it's OK...because in this gigantic, spherical thing called the world we can be whatever we would like to be.

And right now I don't know what I want to be, and who I want to be but I think that right now, it is OK. I think that right now, all the bad times, they will be okay and the good times, they will keep coming... and even if everything isn't OK right away, it will be...

Eventually.