I have been in three of my best friends' weddings in the past two years. It is an amazing and awesome thing to see my good friends find the one for them, and begin living a life in love. One even has a son on the way. Life is moving on for them, and I couldn't be more happy for them. But it sucks to be stuck in the dust. Being married is like being in an exclusive club, and I am nowhere near entering that club. Do I want to? If so then when, and with who? You have to join with someone; it's the only requirement to get in (plus however much money a marriage license and wedding costs but we won't think about that).
Most people think that getting married is more of a female thing, but I beg to differ. Yeah, we may not care as much about the decorations and order of the ceremony, but we do care about finding someone to spend the rest of our lives with. From a young Christian man's perspective, I want to find someone to love like Christ loves the church. A love that will cause me to never leave, to desire to provide in every way, and a love that would cause me to lay my life down if need be. That's the love of Christ!
1 Corinthians 13:4-8 says:
"Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends."
This is the type of marriage I want in the future (WAY in the future). It's not impossible. If God lives in us as Christians, and God is love, then we have everything we need to live out a marriage that is rooted, grounded and steadfast in love. Now I know that there might be little quarrels and disagreements but after all, we are human, but above all if you have Jesus in your heart you should strive to love and be understanding of everyone, especially your spouse!
Now, as I write this I am only 19, but I have spent a lot of time thinking about what I want in a wife. Now it's not a super specific list down to the height and eye color, but it's vague enough to let me choose.
1. Loves to be in the presence of the Lord as much, or more than I do.
2. Loves Star Wars, or comes to love Star Wars through my influence.
3. A heart to serve the people around her.
4. The beauty of her heart shines brighter than her outward beauty
If you're a single guy waiting on the right one, my advice is to stop looking. Yep, quit striving. Keep your eyes open, but seek God first and let him bring her into your life at the right time when you and her are ready. I know that's what I'm doing, and I know that it is going to make my entrance into the Married club so much better.
