It's 2010, you're a Freshman in high school and your best friend tells you that she has a crush on your older sister. You roll your naïve eyes and say "well sorry, but she's not gay!" Then she looks at you and says "Kristen, your sister is a lesbian, do you not know that?" Your heart drops... You're not too sure how to process this. Because in your mind you think "there's no way.. she's my best friend, she for sure would've told me", so you dismiss the comment as if it never happened and she doesn't bring it up again.
A couple weeks go by and that sentence is on repeat in your mind. You start to really think about things in depth to see if there was any substance to it. She's had so many boyfriends!! SO MANY. All the guys love her because she's athletic, pretty, smart, REALLY good at video games and plus she's hilarious. I would've known if she was a lesbian!!! Ehhh she can't be.
It's about a year later, and your sister invites you to your first college party with all her friends. Your cousin was there with you and you experience your first ever night of drinking games. You get pretty drunk (sorry Mom and Dad) and your sister pulls you aside with your cousin and says that there's something she needs to tell you. Immediately you sober up and that thought that you had forgotten about by now, pops up in your mind.
And so she begins...
"Kristen, there's something that I have been really wanting to tell you. You know how close I am with B______? Well... She's my girlfriend, I'm Gay."
Then you have one of those - *RECORD SCRATCH* *FREEZE FRAME*.. Yup. That's me. You're probably wondering how i ended up in this situation.. - Moments
Which leads us back to the initial question...
So, your sister is gay.. now what?
Without any hesitation you said "Yes, I already know you are". And your (very annoying) drunk self turns to her ex boyfriend and says "it's all your fault isn't it?!". Luckily he is one of the coolest people you've ever met and thought it was hilarious.
We're all laughing and you look at your sister who is standing there, glowing. She looks like she just dropped a thousand pound ball of fear off her chest.
In that moment you are immediately overcome with this burst of love and acceptance. Yeah sure, you wish she would have told you before your best friend tried to.. But you see the look of happiness in your sisters eyes and suddenly nothing but that matters.
———————————————————
That moment brought us so close together. Looking back, i understand why it took her so long to tell me... I was 4 years younger than her. I was only in my second year of high school and was still so inexperienced with life. I've never met a lesbian before. I didn't even know what being gay actually meant.
I've always looked up to my siblings. Our parents have always raised us to be our best selves and my brother and sister were(and still are) both a shinning example of what it means to be confident with yourself.
Your sister being a lesbian doesn't mean that she's any less of person then she was before.. It doesn't make her gross, strange or cynical. It makes her brave, strong and authentic.
She is still your big sister.
She's still the one you've looked up to and who you will continue to look up to for your entire life. You will still steal her clothes and fight and make up. You still want her approval. You still want to make her proud and now, more then ever, you want her to live a life with out judgement, pain or fear. You want her to be able to love her future wife with out people looking twice at them with disgust. You love your sister so much that you'll find yourself reading a story about those who's families don't accept their own son or daughter, and it fills you with so much anger. So you take that anger and you turn it into love, you reach out to your sister and you tell her how proud of her you are and how much you love her.
I've been blessed with a family who accepts others, no questions asked. Some of those in the LGBT community can't say the same. So if you are lucky enough to have a family member that trusts you enough to tell you their truth, no matter what your beliefs are, just LOVE ON THEM. Because there are people out there who will make it their mission to do the opposite.
———————————————————
Seeester - I love you endlessly and i always will. You are my best friend and I am so grateful that 9 years ago, you trusted me with your truth. I would never, in a million years, change one single thing about you. You are the best sister in the entire world and I am the luckiest little sis to be stuck with you. Thank you for showing me how to fight for what you believe in regardless of what people may think. I am so proud to call you mine.
Lovingly,
A PROUD sister of a gay.
PS. My sister hates rainbows so naturally i have to throw one in here. 🏳️🌈
