Am I okay? Because most times, I can't tell.

Is it the winter? Or is it me?

Is the cold outside, making me cold inside?

I used to cry, in the comfort of my bed,

Now I can barely, look ahead.

I tell myself it's okay, but is it?

I think my brain, misled my heart,

And I am now, falling apart.

Why did I do this to myself?

Went to a place,

So far away,

I have no space

To get away.

I thought I had nothing to write about, but there is (always) something to write about. There is always something your heart yearns to say. The words may not do justice, to what you're trying to say, but there is (always) something to be said. You can put it aside, and try to ignore it, but it always comes back.

Those feelings you try so hard to suppress keep surfacing. I am to my wit's end because I don't want to deal with them. I don't want to deal with my feelings. I am afraid to admit, the lies I've made to cover up the truth. There are so many secrets I keep hidden inside, that if anyone actually knew...

I try so hard to listen to my heart, but I'm petrified that if I do, I'll end up falling apart. But it makes no sense, because I am not following my heart, and I am still falling apart.

If you ever catch a glimpse of me, just know that I've hidden these thoughts. You try to look for fear in me, but I am really good at hiding it. I am so scared, that my natural instinct is to fake it.

Now tell me, on a scale from one to Maria, how good am I?