I am at that awkward stage of young adulthood, I like to call it the “adolescence of adulthood,” where I still have what is now considered “adult” acne, but at the same time I am buying my own groceries. It just doesn’t feel right. Anyone with this problem understands. Like, I sort of look like an adult, I kind of behave like an adult — given the circumstance — but I don’t feel like an adult.
For instance, I had a whole bag of dill pickle chips for dinner the other night. One morning, last week, I had cookies for breakfast. Two nights ago I forgot to brush my teeth. And presently, I am going commando because I just ran out of underwear…three days ago.
But I think what all young adults forget is that it takes practice. Decades of practice. I’m being serious, like five or six decades of practice. And you know what they say, “practice makes perfect.” But I still have yet to meet the perfect adult.
I think at times we are too hard on ourselves as adolescent adults. We compare ourselves to our other fellow adolescent adult friends way too often and we forget that we all mature differently. For some, it takes a bit more time. We call those people “late bloomers.” And for others, they just take to adulthood so naturally, like falling off of a bike.
But hey! You kept yourself alive this far. Give yourself a pat on the back. Like I said before, we are our toughest critics. So give yourself some imaginary brownie points if you have ever done one or more of the following. Remember, you only need to have done one of the following scenarios to know that you are doing okay, kiddo:
1. You chose to buy the head of broccoli over the bag of dill pickle potato chips that one time…
2. You chose red wine over tequila at least once in your adolescent adulthood…
3. You brought someone home with you one Friday night only to realize that you are out of your anti-baby reinforcement, so you both chose to sleep instead…
4. You buy your own condoms…
5. You’ve cooked something, anything, other than macaroni and cheese, or cereal…
6. You’ve perfected the grilled cheese…
7. And lastly, you bought some sort of kitchenware using your own hard earned money.
If you answered “yes,” or “ehhhh maybe” to one or more of these, then congratulations. You are on the fast track to becoming one mighty fine adult one of these decades.
Parting words: too much tequila will kill you, but a glass of wine a day keeps the doctor away.
Also, eat your fruits and veggies, don’t forget to brush your teeth twice a day, drink lots of water, and if you run out of clean socks just buy a new pair at the store, but please don’t try to do this with underwear. Wash them before wearing…
