As college decisions have been coming out for the past few weeks, I think it is important to address what has been a major flaw, in my experience, with how high school students think.
To provide some context, I went through the triumphs and heartbreaks of college admissions last year as a senior. Throughout high school, I aimed to be the student that was accepted into the most prestigious schools. I worked tirelessly in academics, perceiving my GPA as a grade of my self-worth. I joined after-school clubs, played varsity lacrosse, and volunteered — all in attempts fill my college application when the time came. Whenever I participated in an additional activity, I would instinctively ask myself ‘would this look good on my college application?’
In hindsight, this knee-jerk reaction was extremely illogical and detrimental to my mental health. If I could talk to the 17-year-old me of the past, I would ask myself, "How could you live your life for people who have never met you and will most likely never meet you?" Because, in all honesty, that’s what I did in high school. I lived for the college admissions board. Every A I studied for, I gave to them. Every hour I spent volunteering was theirs as well. Every victory in lacrosse or club meeting was for college admissions boards.
It wasn’t that I didn’t enjoy myself in high school. I did! Even so, my regret is that I spent too much time on things I thought they wanted to see rather than exploring and cultivating my own interests. Therefore, my advice to graduating seniors would be to start doing things for yourself and not for admissions boards. That A is for you, as well as every hour in practice, volunteering, and in clubs.
Your responsibility to them will be over once you graduate, but your responsibility to yourself with last a lifetime.
Nevertheless, this feeling of obligation carries over to college as well. Once the college acceptance craze is over, the new judgment in town is jobs and resumes. It is saddening to see how many students participate in clubs and activities just to put that they did so on their resume. Resumes are summaries of your experiences, so improving yourself by doing things out of fascination instead of the requirement. This will automatically make for a fuller and more meaningful resume.
Ultimately, however, representations of self like resumes and college applications are shallow. You cannot possibly fit all of your accomplishments on to them. So stop worrying about what they look like and live the life you want to! Self-worth is not tied to what your college application or resume looks like at all. When the time comes, use your college application or resume. In the meantime though, find your passion and create a fulfilling sense of self.
