Last year, I wrote an article as to why I decided not to create a list with resolutions for the near year. I had decided to swing by 2018 and see where that was going to take me. Unfortunately, it was pretty ugly.

You know, those sad memes about how 2018 fucked you up tremendously? I can relate to every single one of them.

That's why this year, after having learned from everything that happened last year, I decided to orient myself with a list of goals that I would like to accomplish. Surprisingly, I had shocked myself. The year had begun, and for some reason I began wondering things that I would like to do this year.

Maybe the failure of last year really struck me and decided it was time for a change.

So far, I only have two goals set in mind for this year. One of those goals is to write a book. I used to be an avid writer. Poems. Essays. Short stories. Two novels. Writing was the thing I enjoyed the most, but, sadly, last year I didn't really do much of that. So, as a healing process, I challenged a friend to write a book with me by the end of the year, and she agreed. So far, I'm still trying to figure out the story of my character and what journey he'll have to go through.

The other goal that I have set in mind is to be nicer to myself, to remind myself that I am not made of stone and ice, but of blood and flesh -- that I have feelings and emotions too that can affect me in many different ways if not taken care of appropriately. This year, I am going to be less harsh to myself and love myself even more. This year I turn 20, and with the mindset that I am in, it would not be a great start into my second decade of being alive.

2019 will be the year where I learn how to be selfish and how to put myself first. It's barely been three weeks almost, and everything has been a mess, but I'm not letting this discourage me. Because 2019 is the year where I walk closer to becoming a better me.