It can be hard to love and feel loved by an emotionally guarded person, here are a few things to know that may make this whole thing easier!
1. Yes, I do love you, but I might not say it often.
Professions of love come easier to some, and are very hard for others! The fact that I am not constantly restating my love is not reason to believe I don't like you! Sometimes it is uncomfy for me to put into words how I feel. If you scream, "I LOVE YOU" at me when I'm leaving, the most likely thing to happen will be that I freeze up and say, "Okay, bye!" That's just what happens, I recognize the importance of telling people you love them, but it's easier for me to show how I feel!
2. Try to see that I care about you through my actions.
I'll show you that I care about you by buying you a Starbucks on the way home, sending you a card, carrying your groceries for you, buying you candy or bringing you something that made me think about you when I saw it. Acts of service are the most comfortable love language for those who are not verbal expressers.
3. Know that I appreciate when you open up to me!
I may not have the sappiest responses, but you should understand that I am listening and acknowledging what you are saying, and that I appreciate your vulnerability.
4. Just because I am not outwardly expressing my emotions, doesn't mean I don't have emotions.
I am probably more compassionate and sensitive than anyone else you know, and it's important to know that I absorb almost 100% of everything I hear, even if it doesn't come across that way.
5. I will naturally assume leadership positions.
I am most comfortable when I am in control, and because of this, I will most likely assume a leadership role in any situation I'm involved in.
6. Sometimes I just need my space.
I will always snuggle my dog and hug my family, but it is highly unlikely that I will run up to you and give you a big bear hug. Some people thrive off of physical touch and are very comfortable lounging on their friends and touching each other's hair and giving long hugs goodbye, but that is just not the way I am! Some days I'll give more hugs than others, but don't be offended if I give you a swift high five on the way out of the car.
7. I'll make a lot of decisions based on the logic, not the emotional reasoning.
This is just generally a good thing to know when you're wondering why I chose one thing and not the other.
8. However, I am really indecisive, because I don't want to be responsible for how other people will feel about what I choose.
I don't want to pick where we eat because what if the restaurant I choose is the one you were hoping I didn't choose and then one of us is happy and the other is sad and it's all my fault! sigh.