I have battled with self image since I was six years old. I remember the first boy who ever called me ugly, and it was because of my bangs. I had what I've always called "karate chop" bangs.
Even at six years old, I understood how horrible people could be. Not only did I get called ugly, but I was also called a nerd. I was in gifted enrichment, and I always took extra classes. As I got older, it didn't get any better. I eventually believed I was ugly incarnate.
Hearing those hurtful words was extremely detrimental to my self worth. When you start to doubt your self worth, it tends to push the people you love away; the people that would do anything for you to see your worth. Once those people are gone, it's easy to convince yourself that you're not worthy of love at all. I don't blame the people who left nor do I blame myself. I believe these things happened to teach me the lesson I needed to learn the most: learn to love yourself on your own. 
It sounds easy, I know, but trust me it helps. I used to look in the mirror after finishing my makeup and tell myself I was ugly. My whole day would be awful because someone would look my direction, and I thought they were judging me. I would tell myself they were thinking that I was absolutely disgusting. I remember looking in the mirror one day, and I started crying because, from the second I woke up, I didn't want to look; I didn't want to look in that mirror and hate myself. When I saw myself crying, I remembered every person that ever told me a hurtful word about my image. I then remembered the boy from when I was six. That's when I realized I never truly thought I was ugly, that every time I told myself I was ugly, it was actually every person who ever said it to me. I decided to change. I look in the mirror everyday and I tell myself that I'm beautiful, not just for my looks but for my soul. I think about my little girl who is a spitting image of me, and I remind myself that if I tell myself I'm ugly, she'll begin to think that way herself.
2. There is more to you that what you look like.
Haven't you heard that a billion times? Well, it's because it's true. I have met people who I thought were absolutely beautiful, only to get to know them and they are truly awful. They will be unkind or they speak negatively about others. After meeting people that acted that way, I realized there was more to me. People love me for being selfless and spreading happiness, not because of what I look like.
3. Do not rely on other people to prove yourself worth.
This is the people in your life and people in your social media. I'm bringing up both because I know many people who look to social media for "likes." You will not find your self worth by how many likes you get on a photo because there will never be enough. And when there aren't as many likes as another picture, you'll beat yourself up. As for people in your life, they're going to tell you you're beautiful and that will help, but if you don't love yourself first, you will find ways to disprove them. Then eventually, they'll stop telling you because they know you'll just shove them off. Then we have the people who tell you horrible things. You can't let these people with negative opinions about you affect you at all. Opinions being the keyword there. Not everyone has to think you're beautiful, and that's okay. You'll have you to do that.
4. Buy clothes that make you feel beautiful.
I always feel great putting on clothes that I love to wear. I used to buy clothes based an idea that it would make me feel beautiful. It'd either be too tight or uncomfortable and even though I loved the outfit, I hated the way it fit on my body. I would then blame myself for being ugly. Buying clothes that you hate being in are not going to help you. Focus on outfits that put a smile on your face, and don't worry about what anyone else says If you love it. then you'll love you.
5. Be patient.
As I said before, if you've been negative to yourself for years, you can't turn it around overnight. You will only beat yourself up if you put yourself on a timeline. Love will happen in time, you just have to let it in.
6. Leave yourself love notes.
Sounds silly, but this is one of my favorites. I'm a HUGE fan of sticky notes. I use them for everything, including improving my self worth. I will leave sticky notes in places I know that I will start to doubt myself. I will put them in my purse, closet, car and, of course, on my mirrors. I even have one of my favorite quotes hanging above my mirror.
"Seems the only person who doesn't see your beauty, is the person in the mirror looking back at you." - Taylor Swift
7. Forgive everyone who ever hurt you, and that includes you.
In order to boost your self, you are going to need to move on from the past by forgiving. You can't dwell on the people (including yourself) who said all those hurtful things, otherwise those thoughts will continue to stay prevalent in your mind. Let go of all that negativity to let all the good thoughts in.
8. If all else fails, seek professional help.
If you can't do it on your own, don't forget you can ask for help. It will only help you to seek out therapy. I don't mind admitting that I go to therapy to help with self image, it has only made me better.
I think you might have noticed a word that repeated itself throughout this article and it was: self. It all comes down to you. Once you learn to love yourself, life will become easier and happiness will be more attainable.
With love,
Erika
