Okay, we all can’t be perfect here and every school has it’s faults. We all know that CSC has a billion and ten things that blow every other college out of the water (talking ‘bout you Mountain Day), but there are a few things that we kinda suck at.
1. That location though.
Don’t get me wrong, New London is a wonderful place to live, especially with all the pretty views that come with it, but did you really have to choose a place where the closest Chipotle is an hour away? If there wasn’t a Dunkin in this town, I would’ve dipped faster than Kanye stole the mic from Taylor. And the fact that everything closes before 9 P.M. is a huge buzzkill. Where am I supposed to get 2 A.M. mozzarella sticks, CSC? Riddle me that.
2. Parking Tickets.
Do I even have to explain this one? You park in a visitors spot to run into Colgate for five minutes and all of a sudden you owe $25? That ain’t right, bro. Look, I get it, your limited in parking spots, but if there is no one parked around me in the faculty lot on a Sunday afternoon, I beg of you campo, spare me.
3. Late night options.
Well, since we’ve been stripped of our late night dining this year, we only got the lodge. Ok, the lodge actually is 30 times better, but you gotta spare a few bucks for it AND it’s only open til… midnight? Is that a joke? We need to open a 24 hour dominos real quick before I lose my mind and die from being famished/deprived of some late night food options. Look, I’ve gone through the easy mac stage and it’s not enough. Please, help us out and maybe stay open just til 1? We’ll discuss.
4. Too damn small.
Listen, we all make mistakes in college and so we’re all constantly trying to avoid someone. It doesn’t really help our cause when the campus has a 2 mile circumference and a .5 mile radius. All I’m saying is that when I bump into someone I don’t wanna see, and I mean physically bump into them, I’m not too too thrilled. Thanks for that, CSC.
5. The community isn't too fond of our antics.
We completely fail at having a good relationship with our community and while we may come off obnoxious and rowdy, we’re all just tryna have a good time. We use the term “college town” loosely (don’t worry) because we get so many complaints. I can’t even have a heated debate with my roommates while watching The Bachelor without getting a noise complaint from someone near our off-campus house. We’re not out to turn the next house party into Project X and we’re sorry if we come off disrespectful. Just know that we’re just tryna have some good ol’ college fun while we can, we’re not tryna step on anyone’s toes.
6. Not enough chicken nuggets.
Look Sodexo, just make chicken nuggets a daily option at this point. We need them, honestly, we’re deprived enough of fast food with the lacking options around here. Just understand our pain and give us unlimited chicken nuggets all day long. You’ll be surprised at how much happier processed chicken can make us, seriously.
7. Lack of sports.
We all love soccer, but where’s that football team at? You can’t really tailgate at a rugby game and it’s hard to keep up with the fast-pace of a soccer game when you’re feeling it. When we live this far from civilization, a little football or legitimate hockey would be highly appreciated. With all the love I got for the sports teams we already have here, there’s still a part of me that is missing the excitement of those touchdowns. #RollChargers, am I right, ladies?
With all these things that CSC miserably fails at, I don’t think I could ever go anywhere else. Colby-Sawyer is honestly amazing and if you disagree, you’re 100% wrong. Peace out, homies. XOXO, your favorite Charger.
