We've all seen the rare, colorful, mythical bird fluttering around campus. Sure, it waves at us, gives us high fives, maybe some of us have even wrapped our arms around those sub-angelic wings for a big feathery embrace, but explaining "Blu The Blugold" to another is like trying to sketch a picture of a Leprechaun you spotted in Mobile, Alabama.
You can have boatloads of pride for our school but at some point you must have asked yourself, "Why a fake bird?". It's true, the two colors blue and gold look great together but they have been pushed together so hard we had to drop the "e", create a fantasy fowl and are now represented by this contentious "Blugold". Considering the decision making process for choosing this mascot seems so curiously arbitrary, I will use the same technique in creating the following mascots that we might in fact be better off with to represent our great school.
1. "The Eau Claire Ligers"
This was an obvious choice. Blu has no magical powers I know of except for simply kind-of existing but the Liger was actually BRED for it's skills in magic.
2. "The Eau Claire Animal Control"
Am I not the only that sees an awkward number of animal control vehicles around the Eau Claire area? Seriously, I see them more often than police, longboarders, and the drunk bus combined. Oh, and most schools have animal mascots so if we're the animal control then well that's just a beautiful play on our part.
3. "The Eau Claire Bon Iver's"
Because we may not have much but we sure have him.
4. "The Eau Claire Semi-Peaceful Protesters"
If we lose a game we can always protest it and when that happens, everyone knows--shit might get ugly.
5. "The Eau Claire Pickle Pickers"
At least we'd be a newsworthy school.
6. "The Eau Claire Hill Hikers" or "The Eau Bridge Walkers"
All things considered, no one is tougher than us. Other schools need to be reminded of that from to time.
7. "The Eau Claire Clowns"
First off we can keep our awesome colors and secondly, we get on top of this whole clown situation before next Halloween.
No matter what gyrating costumed character we have windmilling it's arms on the sidelines, the real spirit of UWEC lies within the power of "AND"... Which in my opinion is just as, if not more, confusing and nonsensical than the infamous Blugold.
