1. Sometimes the best thing to do is cry.
Whether it be from a bad grade, a fight with a friend, or a breakup, the best thing to do sometimes is to cry. It’s not easy and you might feel like crying makes you weak. But even the strongest people cry every now and then. I, too, once thought it would make me look weak, but a good cry has helped me so much so many times. It’s better to get it out now than hold it in and explode later. It’s such a relief to be able to shed some tears instead of going to drink or doing something else you'll regret later.
2. Don’t change yourself for anyone.
College is extremely demanding. It is a lot of self-discovery and figuring out who you are and what you want in life. While I would probably say sophomore year has been one of the worst of my life, I would also say it’s been the best because I have learned so much about myself. Don’t ever let anyone pressure you or make you feel bad for who you are. Also, don’t rely on others for happiness; you need to be happy with yourself before you invest your happiness in someone else. From that, don’t change yourself to make someone else happy. Be who you are, and if they care about you, they’ll love you for staying true to yourself. If they don’t really care about you, they’ll try to get you to change into something worse than yourself. Now, if you’re drinking excessively and making poor decisions, then it might be best to change. However, change because you WANT to, not because you HAVE to.
3. You are stronger than you think.
As I said before, crying can make you feel weak. But, it really is the best thing to do sometimes. I have realized recently I can take on anything, and life gets better. It may seem downhill for a long time, but eventually, it’ll go back up. Life can throw a lot of curveballs, but you just have to keep going to the batter’s plate and keep swinging.
4. Sometimes you need to stay in, but sometimes it’s time to get out of the house.
I have a lot of nights where I want to stay in because I’m upset about something, or I’m absolutely exhausted from the events of the week. Some nights I force myself to go out because I know once I get out there with my close friends it’ll be worth it. However, sometimes I need to stay in, reflect, and make myself laugh at my own stupid jokes. But other times, I need other people to laugh at my stupid jokes and make me laugh in return.
5. The golden rule: treat others the way you want to be treated.
If you want someone to treat you with respect, you have to earn respect. You cannot expect people to keep coming back if you continue to treat them poorly. If you want people to like you and want to be around you, you have to treat them with respect and kindness. I have genuinely cared about someone enough that even when I’ve been let down several times, I always continue to treat them how I want to be treated. I want them to see that there are good people out there that will continue to care no matter what. I never stop caring about someone, friend or ex-boyfriend, because that’s just not who I am.
6. Don’t turn off your feelings.
Many people think they have to turn off their feelings to move on or deal with a situation. Some people think it’s best to jump from relationship to relationship because one person is still on their mind that they have to get them off of it somehow. Some people don’t like to be single because it makes them feel lonely. However, it is best to confront those feelings headfirst and deal with them. Don’t just keep moving from one relationship to the next because it’s not healthy. You essentially try to turn off your feelings for one person to turn them on for another because you think that will help. Unfortunately, that’s not how it works. So, don’t numb yourself by drinking or trying to move on by rebounding. Just confront them, and learn from your mistakes.
7. Be happy.
The only person who can make you truly happy is yourself. You'll never feel just right unless you're happy with yourself. Treat others how you would want to be treated, don't ignore the bad feelings because once those are out of your system, the only thing left is to be happy. Be strong, be you, and don't let anyone dull your light.
