1. Almost every single Bachelor is a white, straight, cis-gendered male. This is the “ideal” man: tall, tan, handsome, smart, muscular, polite etc. (Obviously you could argue that Juan Pablo wasn’t polite, but you get the point). It reinforces heteronormativity, the belief that heterosexuality is normal and superior to all other types of intimate relationships. Why do we idolize a select group of men who represent only a small percentage of our population?
2. All “contestants” are slim, fit beauties with their makeup and hair always on point. When they are shown not fulfilling this model (i.e. the Bachelor comes into the house at 4 a.m. to pick up a woman for a date) responses flow like, “OMG! I can’t believe he just saw me with retainers in!” or hiding their faces under covers. If your significant other can’t see you at your “worst” why do they deserve to see you at your best? With a figure like theirs, no one would be uncomfortable showing off their bikini-ready bods at the mansion. This is not to shame the bodies of these women, however, we as a society are constantly reminded of this idea of “the perfect woman” in ads, magazines, every Victoria’s Secret store, etc. So, why do we watch a show that only covers sizes 0-4?
3. The first impression rose. Period. How the “contestants” get out of the limo speaks volumes. There have been some on horseback, playing piano, riding in a cupcake and plenty of other extravagant ways to get the Bachelor’s attention. Only a few hours after the initial meeting and minimal one-on-one conversation, the Bachelor sends on average seven “contestants” home. Yes, this is a time for him to weed out the inevitable drunk and stupid, but there is literally no other reason for heartbreak at this point other than “you’re just not my type”. This, obviously, leads to girls thinking that they are the problem and that the way they are is not attractive. Which can, in return, cause low self-esteem and a negative self-image. Not to mention, this is all on national television! Why do we watch a show where simply being yourself doesn’t cut it anymore?
4. The entire show takes place in less than three months. How do you know if you truly love someone in that amount of time, while he dates 25 other women, and doesn’t express his love back for you? Love should be a mutual arrangement, but this show teaches us that it’s normal for a woman to wear her heart on her sleeve, while the man picks and chooses which one fits best for himself.
5. The Bachelor would be better placed in the “game show” category, rather than “reality TV”, because this is essentially what the show is all about. 25+ “contestants” compete for the love of one man. (p.s. do these women even know who the Bachelor is before sending in their audition tape?) These girls force themselves to become the man’s perfect match in order to be the “winner.” With vacations like Vegas, the Bahamas, and Mexico City, who cares if he is really “Mr. Right”? They’re not working, but traveling the world on national television with a hot guy that takes them on dates to swim with pigs! Some of them will do anything to prove that they are the best candidate to move onto the next week and eventually marry the Bachelor. The “contestants” are treated like pawns in a chess game. There have been proven strategies to “win The Bachelor.” The trophy (engagement ring) goes to the one that causes least drama, fits in well during hometown dates, shows perfect politeness on one-on-one dates, and gives just the right amount on the overnight. Why do we romanticize this idea that love should be a competition with only one winner?
I am a woman. I am not an object to be won. I do not need to change myself to become the perfect match for someone else, and I am personally disgusted by the idea that this show presents. I refuse to watch a game show that romanticizes this idea that love is some sort of competition.
