This is not the helpful person who lends you a hair tie when you realize you're without. The Hair Tie friend is easy to recognize, and maybe you have a few of your own. My first encounter with the hair tie friend was in elementary school. We would talk all the time time about yucky boys, American Girl Dolls and our pets. However, this friend had a nasty habit; she was reliable to a fault, until she wasn't, just like a hair tie. Hair ties work perfectly at holding back your hair. Sometimes you fight to get them out, but they're great -- until they snap. When a hair tie snaps, you can tie it back together, but things are not really the same again. As an 11-year-old it didn't bother me too much, I'd just move on to a new friend until she decided she wanted to be my friend again. Over time I've come across more and more of these 'friends' and have gotten very versed at spotting them.
1. They find fault in everyone around them but never look at themselves.
They find problems with another person, forgetting to check to see if they're the problem. When listening about how their roommate does "nothing ever" for the millionth time, you may recognize the hair tie friend. Just try to no look too bored, they might notice.
2. They gossip endlessly.
We all love to gossip. But it seems to be a form of currency with this person. Sometimes it's all they can do. Just remember, if they're talking about their other friends, they are most definitely talking about you. You may be half convinced that they sign XOXO at the end of their name.
3. You constantly have to justify your friendship.
If you are finding yourself saying, "Oh, but we've known each other for so long," or, "We're sisters, she would never do that," you probably have a hair tie friend. Your other friends may actually be tired of hearing these justifications for the hundreth time.
4. They are elastic.
These friends seem to change by molding, pushing and pulling to whom ever they are around. Their real personality is hard to find.
5. They break long-standing commitments.
It's always for something they consider way more important than your friendship, like a guy or their Netflix account. This may be the "snap," where their reliability finally ends.
Try not to take the "snap" too personally. Adult friendships are much harder than those forged on the school yard. Remember, you can tie the hair tie back together. It may not be the same, and the friendship will probably play a smaller role in your life, but you don't have to throw it away forever.
