5 Ways Every College Student Knows They Are In The Midst Of Finals

5 Ways Every College Student Knows They Are In The Midst Of Finals

The worst times of the best times of your life
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Finals are the bane of any college students’ existence. We all hate it, but we know it’s the only path to the glorious and necessary month off from school. In the weeks leading up to our release, we all despise our blessed academic education and ourselves. Here are the five ways you know you’re in the pit that is finals week.

1. Your chronic illness has magically worsened.

You’ve been sick since you became within a 5-mile radius from school in August. It’s actually impressive how quickly the student body can contract and spread diseases in such a short period of time. It’s as if the bacteria on campus is stronger, the viruses more determined, the mumps: relentless.

During finals week, the lack of sleep, peak levels of stress and poor dietary habits will throttle your degenerate body into a self-destructive hole filled with cough drops, endless tissue boxes and let’s not forget, PACKS of EmergenC!

To add, the swollen lymph node protruding out of your neck health services said would go down within days has actually further inflated. Shocked? Don’t be. That lymph node will swell until it reaches the dimensions of a medium-sized peach.

Enjoy the mobility your neck achieves now. Soon you’ll have as much head mobility as one of the poor buggy pulling horses. You also might wake up with a miscellaneous disease such as a pesky UTI or even pneumonia! Happy studying!

2. Your mental sanity is non-existent.

You have an Accounting and a Philosophy final on the same day. But after hours of studying it seems that your Accounting notes are spitting more ideological notions than the Philosophy notes! Hmm. Your mental stability is in the gutters.

The abundance of all-nighters mixed with the dangerously high doses of Adderall will probably give you permanent brain damage. These delusions of grandeur are just the beginning symptoms. But hey! Don’t worry! It’s not like your GPA is determined by your finals grades! Oh but wait! For the most part, it is! Oooooops.

3. You gain or lose five pounds.

If you’re a stress eater, you can kiss the bikini body you dedicated the entirety of this semester to buh-bye! The second you receive your first study guide you resort to Good Uncle’s pub food portion of the menu and order a LARGE chicken tender and fries, as a study aide, of course.

If you’re feeling a bit health conscious you might throw in a pint of Halo ice cream. Why not! How much damage could the 200 calorie pint do following the 1000 calorie plus snack you just inhaled!

For those who instantly drop five pounds just at the thought of finals, we stress eaters hate you. Nevertheless, your shriveled malnourished bodies suffer just as much as ours. Prepare for designer bags to line your eyes, as well as cheekbones to protrude from your face to give you gaping contour shadows for the face.

No need for bronzer ladies! You must be careful walking to and from the library, any strenuous physical activity could result in your entire body frame shattering. But if your body did shatter, would that mean you would be exempt from finals? Let’s ponder that scenario.

4. Addicts hit a wall.

Students with soft addictions rely on their substance abuse to get them through this week. Nicotine addicts suck their JUUL pods dry until their stash disappears. This subsequently creates a hunt of never before desperation for more pods.

These students are already financially broke so they offer leftover dining hall money, Adderall, or their limbs to buy one more precious pod to get them through the next hour. Survival of the fittest is the name of the game.

5. The library becomes your home.

You have a part of the library you claim as "home" for finals. Whether it’s the corner of the silent room or smack in the middle of the basement, you will create a unique print of your behind on the chair of your choosing. Similar to a thumbprint, the shape you’re ass leaves on that chair will forever symbolize the tears, blood, and sweat you put into your finals.

Study hard.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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To The Girl Who Had A Plan

A letter to the girl whose life is not going according to her plan.
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“I am the master of my fate: I am the captain of my soul.” - William Ernest Henley

Since we were little girls we have been asked, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” We responded with astronauts, teachers, presidents, nurses, etc. Then we start growing up, and our plans change.

In middle school, our plans were molded based on our friends and whatever was cool at the time. Eventually, we went to high school and this question became serious, along with some others: “What are your plans for college?” “What are you going to major in?” “When do you think you’ll get married?” “Are you going to stay friends with your friends?” We are bombarded with these questions we are supposed to have answers to, so we start making plans.

Plans, like going to college with our best friends and getting a degree we’ve been dreaming about. Plans, to get married as soon as we can. We make plans for how to lose weight and get healthy. We make plans for our weddings and children.

SEE ALSO: 19 Pieces Of Advice From A Soon-To-Be 20-Year-Old

We fill our Pinterest boards with these dreams and hopes that we have, which are really great things to do, but what happens when you don’t get into that college? What happens when your best friend chooses to go somewhere else? Or, what if you don’t get the scholarship you need or the awards you thought you deserved. Maybe, the guy you thought you would marry breaks your heart. You might gain a few pounds instead of losing them. Your parents get divorced. Someone you love gets cancer. You don’t get the grades you need. You don’t make that collegiate sports team. The sorority you’re a legacy to, drops you. You didn’t get the job or internship you applied for. What happens to you when this plan doesn’t go your way?

I’ve been there.

The answer for that is “I have this hope that is an anchor for my soul.” Soon we all realize we are not the captain of our fate. We don’t have everything under control nor will we ever have control of every situation in our lives. But, there is someone who is working all things together for the good of those who love him, who has a plan and a purpose for the lives of his children. His name is Jesus. When life takes a turn you aren’t expecting, those are the times you have to cling to Him the tightest, trusting that His plan is what is best. That is easier said than done, but keep pursuing Him. I have found in my life that His plans were always better than mine, and slowly He’s revealing that to me.

The end of your plan isn’t the end of your life. There is more out there. You may not be the captain of your fate, but you can be the master of your soul. You can choose to be happy despite your circumstances. You can change directions at any point and go a different way. You can take the bad and make something beautiful out of it, if you allow God to work in your heart.

SEE ALSO: To The Girl Patiently Waiting With An Impatient Heart

So, make the best of that school you did get in to. Own it. Make new friends- you may find they are better than the old ones. Apply for more scholarships, or get a job. Move on from the guy that broke your heart; he does not deserve you. God has a guy lined up for you who will love you completely. Spend all the time you can with the loved one with cancer. Pray, pray hard for healing. Study more. Apply for more jobs, or try to spend your summer serving others instead. Join a different club or get involved in other organizations on campus. Find your delight first in God and then pursue other activities that make you happy; He will give you the desires of your heart.

My friend, it is going to be OK.

Cover Image Credit: Megan Beavers Photography

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I'm Not Feelin' 22, But I'll Make The Most Of It

The reality of becoming another year older and the stress that it may bring.

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Birthdays are all about being the center of attention, - birthday wishes from friends and family, and celebrating another milestone in your life. People go out of their way to buy party favors, set up parties, and buy gifts just to make someone feel special on their birthday. However, some people dread their special day because of anxiety and depression. This past weekend was my 22ndbirthday, and although I'm usually excited for my birthday, this was the birthday I had been dreading.

Birthdays are inevitable. Once you reach past the age of 21, everything seems to go downhill, or at least I think so. Once I realized I was going to be 22 last Sunday, I realized the new responsibilities and norms that come with turning this age. I am a Junior at the University of Arizona, should be a senior, and most of my friends are younger than me. With most of my friends graduating this year at the age of 22, I can't help but feel bad that I will be graduating at the age of 23. After being at a large university for three years, I have felt "behind" because of my age and academic standing. Being the oldest of my friends brings a sense of anxiety out in me and pressure that I should be graduated by now.

Another issue I have with birthdays at this age is the expectation of certain milestones that I have not accomplished yet. With social media being such a large part of our society today, seeing so many different people on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter posting pictures of what they are doing every second of the day, it's hard not to feel bad if you are not up to par with others lives. Some people are having babies, while others are going to medical school, where do I fit in?

Although birthdays bring some sense of negativity to me, I think that they should be celebrated in a positive light. My best friend, Colleen, knew I was feeling down about my birthday and wanted to help me feel better about turning the big 2-2. She bought balloons, silly string, and letter banners just to decorate our apartment to make me feel excited about the day. She bought me the most unique presents that only a best friend would know I would have wanted. At the end of the day, we went to my favorite restaurant and with the help of Colleen, my day had turned around.

While you may catch the birthday blues at some point in your lifetime, there are ways to change your attitude on the day. You may hear from someone from the past wishing you a happy birthday that can make you smile, or receive a gift from a family or friend that you had your eye on in the store and they knew you had to have it. Don't compare yourself to others when it comes to birthday plans, live the day how you would like and spend it with the people that matter most to you.

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