Well, it’s that time of year again.
In the next couple weeks, school life will resume, which means it’s the time to plan the transition from home life to college life once again. Admittedly, as I’m planning my to-do list of things to complete before I head back to campus, the thought of returning back to school is exciting.
Yet, as I sit here in excitement as my return to school draws near, I can’t help but think that being home for the summer has taught me some valuable lessons I couldn’t have learned anywhere else. These lessons wouldn’t be found or fully experienced within the confines of an overpriced textbook or in the social atmosphere of a university, but rather through the “real world” that home brings you back to.
1. Being back with family is great, but that doesn’t mean the problems you had when you left are magically resolved.
At the end of the school year, I was really excited to be with my family again after not seeing them since my winter break. For the first couple weeks, I was really happy to just spend time with them and enjoy their company. However, I soon realized that sometimes the ongoing issues are still as they were before—ongoing. Disagreements still happen, job stressors aren’t magically remedied, finances are still needing order... you get the idea. Coming home reminds you that, though your outlook on life has changed, the issues you and your family face haven’t changed.
2. Working full- time actually takes up a lot of your life.
This summer, I was fortunate to have a summer job that scheduled me 40 hours a week. Many people don't have that opportunity, and I'm very lucky (and very thankful) to be able to work that much. Nonetheless, with this being my first full-time job, I realized that it certainly restricts my social life over the summer. It made me realize how difficult it is for adults to work full-time and continue to be in constant contact with people they love, whether family or friends. Many times this summer I’ve desired to be with friends, but after a tiring eight hour day, I realize that all I want to do is relax at home and get a good night’s sleep before I go back the next day. It can be isolating, which is something I am nervous about for the future. But I certainly wouldn’t be able to understand that isolation without living a taste of it in the first place.
3. You can’t do everything you want to do.
Because of my limited free time, each moment I had away from work was easily filled with the “have-to's” of being an adult and with familial obligations. This summer, I had planned on reading a significant number of books, practicing my violin every day, volunteering at youth symphony camps and going to the beach with the expectation that I would work only part time. To say the least, I’ve practiced my violin a few times, read a couple books, job shadowed a couple orchestra teachers and gone to the beach a couple times. Though I got a little bit of everything I wanted over the summer, I haven't fulfilled the lofty goals I set for myself. It made me realize that, given obligations, there’s only so much time to do what I want to do. In college you get a taste of it, but, when you are in the “real world” outside of college, you have to be much more intentional and realistic about what your "free" time will be filled with.
4. Money is finite.
Last summer, I worked at a job that gave me much fewer hours at precisely minimum wage, and I spent a lot of money on small items (ie. coffee runs, snacks, lunch, etc.). Since then, I've realized that more money means more responsibility—something I didn’t have as much of last year. Since making more this summer, I’ve had to be more proactive in budgeting, prioritizing purchases, maintaining my savings account and planning big purchases (ie. tuition payments, saving for a car, textbooks, etc.). The paradox of the money matter is this: when you have less, it’s easier to spend money, and when you have more, being deliberative and responsible with spending is more important. It’s this realization that keeps you from depleting your bank account and helps you put money towards the things you most want or need.
5. I may be a legal adult, but I still have a lot of growing up to do.
The college student stereotype of being a know-it-all is there for a reason. When I was at school, I learned so much about how to approach the world around me. I had space to critically think about solving real-world problems and the space to criticize my worldview, which led to a greater understanding of the world. But I also had a sort of pride that I had everything figured out. Coming home for the summer changed how I approach the world. This transition reminds me that, though I have learned a lot, there’s still a lot that I don’t know about the world. I don’t, in fact, know everything, and I never will. Coming home has allowed me to come to terms with the reality that life experience is a big part of growing up and attaining knowledge.
And yes, I can schedule my own hair cut and buy groceries and “adult.” But I still have ways before I can come to terms with scheduling my own doctor’s appointment or before I have to start paying bills.
Don’t get me wrong with all these points. I think college has a place in helping us grow up and be equipped to face the world around us. I think having the space to think and the world around us in community with others is an absolute privilege, and I could not be more thankful. Yet I think living in the real world is important to have a better understanding of how to pave a way for a change.
It’s like this: we can plan on building a house by making a list of what materials we would need to build it. We can make a blueprint and have cost estimations and a theoretical understanding of how to build the house. But you don’t truly realize the undertaking of building a house until you start. You may be short on screws and nails. The ground may be rocky and require more time to build a foundation. It could rain and mold could develop. The siding you need may be out of stock and you have to buy something more expensive than what you budgeted for. In theory, the home would’ve already been built, yet the unpredictable nature of actually building the home has changed the initial plan. The only way to get better at anticipating these mishaps is to keep building houses, or rather In order to understand how the world works and where the flaws are is to live in the world with your plans in hand, being prepared to adapt to issues that may come up.
In short, I am excited for the upcoming school year and the lessons I will learn, but I am certainly thankful for the lessons about the real world that this summer has taught me.
