I love makeup. I love wearing makeup, watching makeup videos, trying new makeup trends, everything. Ever since I was 12 years old and bought my first tube of mascara, I’ve been in love.

I never really understood the whole “makeup v. natural” look thing. Guys want a girl who looks natural, but not too natural, with a little bit of makeup, but not too much makeup. To me, I always considered makeup to be a personal choice. Oh, you don’t like to wear it? That’s cool. Oh, you want to cake your face in five different colors? You go.

Makeup is fun, beautiful, and diverse just like the different people who wear it. It’s designed to enhance your qualities and make you feel powerful.

However, I recently discovered something about myself. I was letting makeup get in the way of who I really am. I was more comfortable with my makeup face than I was with my natural face. I was using makeup as a shield of protection, rather than embracing it as an additional accessory.

So, I decided to let it go for a while. If you’re a makeup fanatic like me (or even if you’re not), check out these five things I learned from going without makeup.

1. My skin cleared up.

This one is pretty obvious. Some types of makeup can be good for your skin, but too much of it for too long causes acne, wrinkles, spots, etc. During this super stressful time in the semester, not wearing makeup gave my skin a break and let it breathe a little bit, clearing those annoying zits right up.

2. I felt more vulnerable.

There’s just something about not wearing makeup that tends to make us feel insecure. Maybe it’s societal standards pushed on us, or maybe it’s our own insecurities, but these last few weeks have definitely left me feeling more vulnerable than ever. At first, I felt ugly, unstable, exposed.

I felt like people were judging me, and taking pity on me for my poor makeup-less face. Of course, this was all in my head, but allowing myself to feel vulnerable in public really opened me up to new opportunities.

3. I was more open.

This was definitely true. Because of my newfound vulnerability, I was much more open to my friends, families, and complete strangers. I felt more natural, and more in tune with everyone around me. This opened me up to new ideas and experiences, like going to church without makeup on for the first time ever. Strange, awkward, uncomfortable, but relieving all at the same time.

4. I recognized myself more.

This was something I didn’t expect. Before, I always thought of myself as the face with the makeup on. But now, I started to see myself for who I really was, without all the gunk. When I did wear makeup again, I saw her as the outsider, as the other me.

Not wearing makeup allowed me to recognize myself again for who I am, plain and simple. I looked in the mirror and was happy with what I saw because it was me.

5. I loved myself more.

Seeing myself for who I really was allowed me to embrace my body and face in their entirety, and love myself without anything extra. I finally felt at peace with who I was and how I looked, and I loved that.

I love my square face and pale skin. I love my thick eyebrows, high cheekbones, and blue eyes. I love my crooked teeth and the bump on my nose that runs in my family. I love the little zits I get on my chin because they remind me that nobody’s perfect.

I love makeup. And trust me, you’ll still be able to find me watching new makeup videos, practicing my contour and seeing how far I can stretch my winged eyeliner. But I love myself more. And if it takes me going without my favorite accessory for a while to remind myself of how beautiful I am just being me, then so be it.

Beauty doesn’t come in a bottle. It comes in each and every one of us embracing ourselves and choosing love over inhibition.