We've all had to give our friends advice at times, and sometimes be the bad guy with bad news. Sometimes we have to tell them the things they don't want to hear, but they thank us later on. Though we can see when a friend is in trouble, and give them the advice to avoid this, we often have a hard time taking our own advice, so because you won't take your own advice I'm here to tell you a few things.
Wether you're 18 or 84, there is no time that is okay to waste on someone who doesn't genuinely, or at all, care about you. Stop trying to convince yourself that they care about you. If they do, they'll show it and you will be able to tell.
Stop putting your time and effort into someone who isn't giving you anything back. If you're constantly going out of your way to see or talk to someone else and getting nothing in return, that's a problem. You shouldn't have to feel like you're annoying or bothering because you're the only one that puts in any effort to hang out or communicate.
Trust your gut. Stop trying to convince yourself that someone is a good person when they've done even the smallest things to prove otherwise. Once you start to get the sick to your stomach feeling, give up. It isn't going anywhere but down from here. Don't try and convince yourself someone is a good person and only disappoint yourself in the end.
Trust actions, not words. People will go out of their way with words trying to convince you or something such as they're a good person, or they're loyal, etc. Only people who truly are will prove they're who they say they are with actions. People lie. They'll lie straight to your face and have no remorse, or they'll beat around the bush, they won't lie, but they'll avoid the truth. Only trust words backed up with actions that you see with your own eyes.
Don't make yourself miserable to make someone happy. Putting others before yourself is most of the time a good thing. Never put someone before yourself who appreciates none of it. If you're constantly going out of your way for someone, putting their feelings, needs, and so on above your own and you're getting no appreciation, stop. Don't convince yourself they appreciate it and continue to do nice things for them. If it isn't obvious, they don't care at all and you're wasting your time. Of course, they'll soak up the good things you're doing for them, but they really don't care at all.
All people are not as great as we wish they would be. All people do not genuinely care about anyone other than themselves, and they don't feel the same way we may. There are people who lie, and people who cheat, and people who just don't care about us at all, and people who will tell us they do, but really don't. We will most likely try to convince ourselves otherwise though deep down we know the truth. We all have a hard time taking our own advice, so here is someone else giving you advice. So listen, take the advice, and stop wasting your time on people who don't deserve it.
