Moving into a college dorm is a huge adjustment for several reasons. If you have never shared a room before, living basically on top of another person for months out of the year can take some getting used to. Dorm living forces you to make space out of space that isn’t there, deal with all the strange noises that come along with living in a dorm, and most importantly, get used to the fact that you no longer only share a bathroom with just your family members.

College, so far, has taught me many things.

One of these things is as follows:

Girls are gross.

So gross.

Since so many girls use the bathrooms in dorms, it’s impossible to pinpoint who makes what mess. Due to this reason, I am assuming, some girls find it too time-consuming to clean up after themselves, so they just don’t.

In my two years of dorm living, I have experienced many horrific, and sometimes downright strange (finding ramen noodles in the shower drain, for example) bathroom experiences.

Here are my top five reasons (and sassy explanations) as to why I loathe sharing a bathroom with so many fellow college girls:

1. There is hair everywhere, all the time.

I know it can be hard to control where your hair happens to fall, especially if you have a lot of it. However, stepping into the shower and finding clumps (and I mean, serious clumps) of hair on the wall…it makes me wonder if people have just stopped caring all together.

2. People forget to wrap it up!

Pads, that is.

Now, I am a firm believer that the menstrual cycle is not something to be ashamed of, or to be kept a secret. However, one thing I believe should be kept away from the public eye is…well…menstrual blood (or any type of bodily fluid, for that matter). It is of common courtesy to wrap your used feminine products in a hearty amount of toilet paper before throwing it into a garbage can (especially if said garbage can is lidless). Some girls do not follow by these rules, though. It can be very unsettling to look down to see a used pad, out in the open, in a bathroom that is used by many.

3. Bathrooms are not for food!

Nothing is worse than going into the bathroom to brush your teeth, and being greeted by the lovely smell of old Kung Pao chicken. Some girls decide that walking to one of the garbage rooms (that are literally located down the hallway) is way too much effort, so they decide to throw away their unwanted food in the bathroom garbage, leaving the small room lingering with the smell for the entire day. Also, another huge pet peeve of mine is when ladies empty their food into the sink, and leave remnants in the sink drain. At least have the decency to clean up after yourselves. Bathrooms, especially the ones in your home away from home, are not supposed to make you feel dirty after using them. Having leftover food spewed all over the bathroom can make for a gross, unclean feeling.

4. Everything is always wet.

The floor, the countertops, the toilets…everything. The amount of times I almost slipped in the bathroom this year is disturbing. (My life flashed before my eyes each time.) The amount of times I had to change my socks due to the fact that I stepped in a puddle the size of Lake Ontario is also disturbing. Not only is having water all over the floor a huge safety hazard, it is also very annoying.

5. Number two.

Before I start on this one, let me just say that everyone poops. It’s nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed of. If you are comfortable with manuring in front of whoever may walk in that door, than kudos for you, you win at life! But for some people, in order to let things flow pleasantly, there needs to be a little privacy. There is nothing worse than when you are in the middle of dropping a dookie and that bathroom door opens and in comes some random girl, a girl you have no relation to besides living in the same hallway. I’m all for making new friends, but I feel like listening to the “ploop” of the toilet water while I go the bathroom is not a great way to begin a friendship. Anyways, I feel as if whenever I am going number two and someone walks in, they always take their sweet-ass time in the bathroom. Obviously, they are aware I am pooping, for I am just sitting on the toilet silently. But this does not seem to faze the other bathroom-goer. No. It’s as if my discomfort is humorous to them, for they will take five minutes to wash their hands as I’m just trying not to poop in the presence of a stranger. I can’t be the only one who goes through this…right?

I’m aware that this article mainly consists of me bitching about sharing bathrooms, but it is something that I had to get off my chest after two years of dealing with this buffoonery.

Luckily, I will be living in a suite next semester that consists of me and five other lovely roomies! We’ll have our own bathroom, so I finally won’t have to share one with people I don’t know, which will hopefully make my daily functioning much easier!