When I first heard CW cancelled The Carrie Diaries, I was outraged. The Carrie Diaries, or better known abbreviated as TCD, had become part of my life for the two years it was on air. This show was based off of the books written by Candace Bushnell, a prequel to the infamous Sex and the City, and essentially revolved around Carrie Bradshaw's high school life. With eye candy Austin Butler and fashion icon Anna Sophia Robb as the main characters, TCD encompassed Carrie Bradshaw's in a light we've never seen before. In the small span of two seasons, we were infused in her life - her unstable yet passionate love with Sebastian Kydd, her ambitions to be a writer with Interview magazine, and the rocky situations her family and her best friends were thrown into. And along with the captivating drama the show created, we also were introduced to some of the life lessons. Here a few that resonated with me, and still to this day, influence the way I look at life:
1. Letting Go
"Letting go of people or traditions is hard because you invest so much in them, that to let go can be scary. But it can also be liberating...or even essential to your happiness. If you don't let go, you can find yourself in a dark place...unable to kick your worst habits. And sometimes, if we truly love someone, we have to be okay with letting go." (Season 1, Episode 13: Kiss Yesterday Goodbye)
This quote is one of my favorites. Letting go of my former best friend was one of the hardest things I have ever had to do. I remember how hard I used to hold on to the hope that we were still best friends despite the fact that we weren't. I would grasp on to the idea that everything was exactly how it was before. Because I didn't want myself to believe it, I just...didn't let go. During that time, I was a mess. Sometimes, holding on can hurt you even more than losing whoever it was in the first place. Just as Carrie Bradshaw put it, it's hard but if you don't let go, you will regret it.
2. Kiss Yesterday Goodbye
"Geoffrey Chaucer wrote, "Time heals all wounds." But what he failed to mention was the scares those wounds leave behind. The painful things that happen permanently leave their mark. But, they're always there as a reminder, as a memory. And as time passes, maybe the memory gets a little fuzzy. But we always have the scar to remind us it happened...that we lived through it, that we survived." (Season 1, Episode 13: Kiss Yesterday Goodbye)
I've always been fascinated with the concept of scars. Literally, they leave behind an imprint of sorts. They serve as a reminder of what happened. Metaphorically, this can easily be applied. Scars of painful memories in your life will always be with you, whether you choose for it to be there or not. Many people are ashamed of these scars - building a wall up to guard them from future endeavors. Yet, no one really has a positive outlook on it. Carrie Bradshaw is completely right. The scars are there to remind us that we survived through whatever hurt us so bad and that itself is a victory. That should be something you can be proud of, to cherish. They all make you who you are, and loving yourself can leave a wonderful mark of its own.
3. Win Some, Lose Some
"When you think about winning, it always seems so triumphant-- a big cheer goes up, fireworks, the big victory. But sometimes those victories aren't an explosion at all. Sometimes what we gain can be small...like understanding what our friends are going through. And sometimes the losses can feel overwhelming. And often then you realize, winning and losing isn't the point at all. And sometimes making a point can be its own triumph. Maybe it's true. It doesn't matter if you win or lose, as long as you play. Stay in the game." (Season 2, Episode 1: Win Some, Lose Some)
Sometimes, we focus too much on winning and losing. During simple board games, we easily get caught up in winning and losing. In sports, it's often: no matter what, you win. There isn't an if or maybe. Because of this, it seems like everyone has divided their lives in wins and losses. It's become more important than just playing the game - which speaks more in volumes about strength and will than gaining anything in the first place.
4. The Great Unknown
"They say that with knowledge comes power, so it's safe to assume the inverse is also true-- "With no knowledge comes vulnerability." What we don't know about the people we love or what we don't know about love, period, can be scary. But maybe that fear is okay. What is out there that is unknown can propel us to do more." (Season 1, Episode 9: The Great Unknown)
Not knowing something about someone you know can often obstruct a relationship. When you don't know a detail or a secret, you often want to automatically distance yourself. You want to have space so you don't get hurt when you find out what you don't know; it's a knee jerk reaction. However, distancing yourself can also mean potentially destroying the relationship you had with the person in the first place. When my friend first started dating her boyfriend, she was afraid. She didn't quite know him that well and she had no idea where the relationship would go. Yet, now it's been a little over two years and they're still going strong. She decided not to back away just because she was scared. Fear is okay. It propels us to do more, be more, and learn more about the people around us.
5. Play With Fire
"As children, we are taught not to talk to strangers, not to run into the street, not to play with fire. But as we get older, always staying safe can prevent us from experiencing all of what life has to offer. If you never take risks, you don't really get a chance to live at all. And what's the fun in that?" (Season 2, Episode 6: The Safety Dance)
When I was younger I was always shy. I never really went out of my way to be social, I always let it come to me. And if it didn't come to me, I was fine. I could be alone and be perfectly content. However, the older I got, the more I realized it isn't fine. It's okay to miss out on a few things, yes, but regret is never okay. I realized that if I didn't do something that was different than what I usually do, I'm not really living my life. Sometimes, playing it safe can limit what life has to offer. And limiting your life can often lead to lots of regrets. This past summer, I road-tripped to Savannah, Georgia with my friends for the Fourth of July weekend. It was something I would never do. Though, during the whole trip, I experienced new things and met new people - it broadened my horizons and showed me that there's so much more to the world. I can't play it water while the world is playing with fire.
These life lessons are just the beginning. The Carrie Diaries has not only shown me the ropes of how to be comfortable with yourself, but it has also shown me how to grow as a person. It's taught me that it's okay to be scared, to be vulnerable because if you block everything off because of your emotions, you find yourself limiting what else is there in life. The Carrie Diaries will always have a special place in my heart (and not only because of Sebastian Kydd), and while I'm still recovering over the cancellation news, I can promise you I will still be watching reruns of this show when I'm eighty and can barely walk. But, for right now, RIP TCD, thank you for all that you've taught me. You will be missed.
