Growing up, I was extremely lucky to have a close relationship with my grandmother. When I was 9 years old, she left her crumbling apartment complex in Oklahoma City and moved into our house. Although I had the ability to form a closer relationship with my grandmother than many people my age, I did not. Since she was a constant in our house, I took advantage of the fact that she was always around and never bothered to cherish our time together.
However, my blase attitude about my grandmother would change in an instant. Early one morning, my grandmother fell from the ninth stair on our staircase to the hardwood floor below. She fractured her clavicle, broke her cheekbone and six ribs, and suffered a bleed on the brain. She spent a week in the hospital and almost a month in a rehab facility to regain the ability to walk. In a second, the home dynamic I had come to know was gone. In the month she was absent, I realized how quiet the house was without her.
My grandmother was fortunate enough to make a full recovery from her fall. However, many stories like hers do not have the same happy ending. When my grandmother was in the hospital, I would often find myself staying up at night, thinking about all the moments I blew her off or declined her phone calls. Her fall added a much-needed perspective to how precious life is and how the world you know can change in a moment. Since her fall, I have been making a conscious effort every day to make the most of my time with my grandmother. Here are four ways you can make the most of the time you have with your grandparents:
1. Talk To Them About Their Life
The largest chunk of our grandparent’s lives took place long before we were born. If our main understanding of their experiences stems from what we have experienced with them, we are missing out on decades of memories. My grandmother was born in 1940 and lived most of her teenage years outside of the United States. In taking the time to learn about her life, I have heard stories of war, love, heartbreak, and happiness. Her life is fascinating, and I cannot imagine the regret I would feel if I never got the chance to learn about it.
2. Learn To Do Something They Like
I feel like a huge reason we don’t devote a lot of time to our grandparents is because there is such a huge difference in the way we were raised and the worlds we grew up in. For example, my grandmother just recently learned how to text and can’t stand it; she would rather spend her time listening to audio books and watching the classic movie channel. However, our grandparents have a unique skillset that we can learn a lot from. My grandmother worked in the kitchen of a military base and still loves to cook. I found that we can surpass our generational differences by cooking a great meal together, something I have come to enjoy.
3. Spend Time With Them
My grandmother loves nothing more than the St. Louis Cardinals. She knows the name, position, and batting average of every member on the team. Whenever the Cards are playing, I can find my grandmother watching it on TV or listening to it over the radio. Once a week, I try to sit down with my grandmother and watch a game. We celebrate together when the team wins and grumble together when the team loses. Something as simple as watching a movie together or taking them out to dinner can mean so much.
4. Don’t Wait To Cherish Them Until It’s Too Late
As the old saying goes, “you don’t know what you have until it’s gone.” We should never take our time with anyone for granted. I learned this firsthand and was fortunate enough to be given an opportunity to change the way I viewed my relationship with my grandmother. Initiate a conversation. Write a letter. Plan a trip. Make a meaningful connection with your grandparents today. There is so much we can learn from them and their stories are too important to wait.
