For the longest time, I was envious of my friends who had both of their parents in their lived and envied their "American Dream" lifestyle. I always thought that in order to be happy in life you have to have a complete family, but now that I'm older and wiser I've realized that that's not always the case. There are many single mothers that are raising their children on their own and are doing perfectly fine. My mother just so happens to be one of those women. She has taught me so many things over the past 23 years and I'll always keep those life lessons close to my heart.
1. Acceptance
Just because you don't have both parents in your household doesn't mean that your family is as broken as society makes it seem. You don't need two parents to become some spectacular person in this crazy world, and I've accepted that. Life is always going to throw you curveballs, but what matters is how you respond to them. If you want something out of life, always remember that it's never too late to get it. My ma accepted the fact that she was raising two girls on her own and she hasn't let that stop her from becoming the best mother and person she can be. Her days consisted of working 11-hour overnight shifts and being a full-time parent who attended all events at my sister's and my school.
2. Hard work
Nothing in life is free. You get what you give. My mom has worked hard for everything that she has and to make sure that my sister and I have everything we need, but there were days when she came up short and things didn't go as planned. I remember walking up to my front door and seeing a yellow lock on our apartment door forbidding us to go inside. At that time, my sister didn't know why the lock was on the door or what it symbolized, but being the oldest I knew exactly what it meant and it wasn't anything to be thrilled about. She was late paying rent so the landlord locked us out of our apartment. My mom ended up working overtime at her job just to bring in some extra cash. My favorite thing she's taught me from that experience was that a driven person doesn't complain; they just do.
3. Sacrifices
Sometimes we need to take the microscope off ourselves and focus it on the big picture. Being a single mom means sacrificing a lot of things. As a single parent, there were times when my mom would put the needs of my sister and myself before hers.
4. Respect
Having respect is nothing if you can't give respect. When I was growing up, my mom would say, "Don't respect someone because of their age; respect someone because of who they are." Single moms (and parents in general) have to live by example, and she does just that. That day when she went to talk to the elderly landlord about possibly removing the lock on our door, I could see my mother's eyes begin to water, but she did not let a single tear roll down her face, at least not in front of us. She could've easily yelled and disrespected our landlord, but she put aside her anger and did what she had to do to get the lock taken off our door. That was the day I realized I wanted to be exactly like my mom when I grew up.
The people that get to know us best are our parents. They have the greatest influence in our life. They sacrifice the world in order to give their children the best life possible. My mom always tries to do the right thing no matter what the cost. I once heard her say, "I may not be the perfect parent, but I'd like to think I'm a good parent." In my opinion, my mother is the most spectacular person God has ever created. She's the person that has impacted my life the most.
All in all, I wouldn't have my life any other way, because being raised by my ma alone was the best thing that ever happened to me. Let's face it, I turned out to be pretty amazing (but seriously). In all seriousness, she's made me a strong, happy and independent woman. So with that being said, I tip my hat to all of the single mothers who are raising their children like champs. You guys are truly a blessing in disguise.
