Another week of poetry through my poetry experiment. This is has been quite a trip so far! Honestly, I’m surprised I’ve stuck with it this far. It’s quite taxing to the mind. However, I will pursue!
For those of you who do not know why I am doing this, I will quote my last article here:
“I have realized that a great way to keep sane when you’re busy (especially with very tedious work) is to keep your creativity flowing. So recently, I have decided to start a sort of creative goal for myself. I’m going to write 365 poems. That is one every day without stopping. This is all free form and off the cuff. So if it’s short, long, good, and/or crap, that is up for you to decide.”
Now that’s out of the way, please enjoy!
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This one is a bit introspective. It's two different views on being a social person, but believing one side is right when they are all subjective.
October, 18th 2016
7/365
Social
I don’t know why some days are better than others
The social aspect of me is constantly in tatters
I don’t really think people trust one another
Isn’t that an aspect of life that really matters?
But I see it daily on the campus I walk
People don’t take the time to stop and talk
Oppressively believing their way is right
Putting down others when their thoughts just might
Be correcting their ego.
I could just be the same on the other end
Constantly questioning all of my actions
Rather stay at home studying than spend
Any time worrying about a possible negation
But I do this on the daily in my room
I don’t take the time to stop and talk
Oppressively believing my way is right
Putting down others when their thoughts just might
Be correcting my ego.
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This one is quite dramatic. I'll let you be the judge of what it means. The meaning can be quite different to many people, I believe.
October, 19th 2016
8/365
Please Wait For Me
The things that won’t change
They never have
For so long I have been in this place of nonconformity
This may sound strange
For a ground to pave
I miss all of those days of early pacificity
I’m not any younger in my age
I’m not very glad
My loved one is in such a horrific reality
I want to be the one who saves you
I want to be the one who lifts you
I try my best and at the same time, I don’t
Does my ego hold on or is it I who can’t let go?
Is it even possible to save you
With five years that I have left
I’m working as much as I can, or am I?
What my body wants and what my mind says
Only causes internal duress
I can’t seem to change
I never have
I continue this strain of constant nonconformity
I worry of your safety
I always have
Fearful of your constant state of reality
You live out your worst on the daily
Promises that are always on the contrary
You’ve taken all that you can carry
So many ideas that I can’t seem to marry
I’m still full of my own ego
Those caring words are only a placebo
To cull off the negative attention
Blind to any kind of intervention
Why do I feel the way I do?
In the end I’ll always love you
But I still don’t know what’s true
Ambivalent to follow through
Please wait for me
I’ll come around
So, please wait for me
But again, my ego’s abound
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This one is an interpretation an a homeless individual. A lot of the time I just create an idea in my head, think about the situation/feelings of the individual, and just start writing. Or I try and evoke a certain feeling (maybe even explain an unexplainable feeling?).
October, 20th 2016
9/365
Vagabond
Traveling the states with an unknown face
Come into this place ordering something to take
Back home.
I pack my bag full of personal bull
On the bar counter where I sit on the stool
All alone.
I travel these streets for miles and miles
Seeing so many kinds of styles
Vagabond spots across the town
Paving floors or placing tiles
I’d make money doing that for a while
On days when it’s hot and humid
Visions become extreme and lucid
It’s hard.
My choices could have been better
My family ties have all been severed
With no regard.
But I see their side of this lecture
I chose this life worthy of no literature
Irony always seems to hit me when I’m down
What keeps me going is this piece of scripture
“Don’t ever give up, even if I’m out of the picture.”
She was always there for me
Even at times when I couldn’t see
The truth.
I’ll always live for her fondly
With how she spoke softly
I love you.
And I still do.
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This one pretty much explains itself.
October, 21th 2016
10/365
Double Sided
She’s standing there
Lady so fair
I muster up the words
But really putting on airs
The attempts always seem futile
The only salvation is that I’m cute
Never fails to make them smile.
Pity is a word that I’ll always rebuke
Even if there’s a grain of truth in that
I’ll make up for the qualities I lack
Hoping she’s satisfied that I’ve got her back
Still overthinking every single nick-knack
Even after that miracle
She’s standing there
Lady so fair
As I muster up the words
But really putting on airs
Because I’m not really good at this
But I’ve learned at the same time
This is only the front side of the list
Yours is probably on the back side of mine
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This piece is like a take on someone who was pushed to the limit with their abuse.
October, 22th 2016
11/365
What Was Coming
He began to speak in words so crass
Nothing new from this mouth
But referencing her mother really was the last
She couldn’t take the buttons he pressed
Leaving to go back down south
But he stops her with a rip to the dress
Days that used to be are now the past
To the door is where the mind had gone
A shot rang out like a marching of brass
She runs down into the basement
With resentment in what she had done
She did not realize it was a loaded gun
He never asked for the worst
But he sure deserved it
Now he’s retrograde in his own hearse
Only wanting to scare him back into reality
The closet box was where it’s kept
The night is cold with fatality
Turned herself in with internal duress
Years that were now so long
Somehow she is now feeling less
She thought it would change everything
Which it most certainly did
But not for the better like she was imagining
Once a life has been taken, it can never come back
Your heart always remembers it
Every time she awakens, she sees those bloody tracks
That day everything turned black.
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October, 23th 2016
12 of 365
Trust
Life is a masquerade of confusion
Never know when the truth is an illusion
When you're back is turned your left in destitution
And your mind is full of pollution.
She doesn't know exactly how I feel
He doesn't see the pain I'm in
She's just using me for her next meal
He's here for the power of controlling
Do we trust one another?
There's always doubt, even with your brother
The kind of doubt I wish I could smother
Kill it off like a protagonist's mother
Personality comes seeping through
In my psyche I'll let you through
But I couldn't see you through and through
Through your ruse I choose to mentally cruise past the truth
Ahhh, the ignorance of youth
He doesn't know exactly how I feel
She doesn't see the pain I'm in
He's just using me for his next meal
She's here for the power of controlling
How can we branch out when we can't find trust in this small war?
There's no silver lining to these clouds, no more open doors
Trust always cherished in ways uncalled for
Why is my foundation shaken to its core when I promised I wouldn't do this anymore?
No longer the one that you adore
Treating me like I'm some kind of chore?
Now that I'm beaten to the floor
I see that you never looked up to me
I'm finally free from your idealized sodomy
But what is free when your frail and lonely?
Being forgotten is worse than your only enemy.
He's here to cover his tracks
She's here to forget her past
You're here to making this contrast
I'm here to make sense of all that
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I recently listened to a lot of Nirvana recently. I tried to emulate Kurt Cobain's style of writing with this one. I don't think I did to good of a job at it. He had a very unique way of writing lyrics.
October, 23th 2016
13/365
Protection, Transgression
I tried so hard to be something I’m not
Now I’m tired of doing it
Children think that they know it all
But they really don’t know shit
The youth is leading the charge again
Nothing politics can’t control
You read the words that I’m thinking
The models have reversed their roles
Reflection
Correction
No sleep in this damnation
Protection
Transgression
I don’t see any relation
Just because you read it once
Doesn’t mean it’s true
Take a look at it again
And you’ll see right through
Hazards take the day again
Nothing politics can’t control
With every unforgettable sin
Shut up just like before
Reflection
Correction
No sleep in this damnation
Protection
Transgression
I don’t see any relation
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I hope these poems made you think, entertained you, or inspired you in some way. Please let me know what you think of about of them, if you have any suggestions, or want to mention a favorite in the comments!