32 Things To Do When You're Feeling Hopeless or Alone

32 Things To Do When You're Feeling Hopeless or Alone

We all have lows, right? Here's some stuff do to instead.

With the issue of suicide being on the back of everyone's minds as of late, I think it's important to remind ourselves and others that suicide is never the answer. As my mother would always tell me, "suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem." Help is out there; (most) problems are temporary. And when a problem does seem never-ending, know that there is light all the way at the end of the tunnel. It'll just take strength and courage to get there.

Now, with all that being said, I know just how hard it can be to hear these things and to have a positive outlook. When depression hits, it hits hard. It's not easy to take a step and think rationally when you're in a "low." I know that; it's a problem I've faced myself.

I've dealt with depression and suicidal ideation for almost half of my life. It's living in my own head and ruminating in my own self-loathing thoughts that takes me down to my lowest of lows. Some lows can last days, others go on for months, with few moments of relief in-between. But it's these moments that I notice myself engaging in constructive thoughts and activities or surrounding myself with people who care about me (sometimes intentionally, sometimes unintentionally). I strive to make these moments more frequent and long-lasting.

Here's a list of things I (and others) have found most helpful in providing some solace in low times:

1. Listen to you favorite musical artist(s).

2. Eat your favorite dish (in moderation; don't think about calories for once in your life).

3. Go on a short run or brisk walk.

4. Or just open a nearby window (sunshine and fresh air does wonders).

5. Choose one, close, reliable friend to confide in.

6. Take an unplanned, spur-of-the-moment venture (by yourself or with a friend(s), whichever is comfortable).

7. Practice self-love. Think of one thing a day you did right for yourself (maybe write in down on a sticky).

8. Put yourself out there more (vulnerability is okay).

9. Go on a hike (we are surrounded by endless mountains and trails).

10. Watch a (new) movie.

11. Watch a feel good movie or show you know and love.

12. Have a drink in a relaxed setting- if you're of age (solo or with a friend).

13. Wear a piece of clothing you haven't touched in a while (or at all).

14. Invest in a small pet (cats, guinea pigs, hamsters -- all make comfy companions).

15. Plan to eat at least one meal a day with someone who makes you happy.

16. Get up and go to the GYM. (Do something physical. No lie, it actually helps.)

17. Write a poem.

18. Make something "artsy" to call your own (paint it, sculpt it, build it, draw it, just do it). Hang said creation.

19. Take the initiative to do something outside of your comfort zone this weekend (be safe, take a friend to enjoy the experience with).

20. Call someone in your family, or someone who's like family (sister, grandpa, aunt... doesn't have to be your mom!).

21. Take a shower or bath (not rushed, just relax).

22. Whatever space you're in that's making you feel "some type of way" about yourself or situation, get out of it.

23. If you're unhappy with the people you surround yourself with, place yourself in novel social situations.

24. Join a new club or organization.

25. Consider starting a journal (write it in as often as you so please).

26. Take on a job. Find purpose with also earning money.

27. Eat a piece of fruit.

28. Do something (like sit, relax, homework, catch up with a friend) by a body of water -- river, lake, whatever.

29. Hug someone or something warm.

30. Take 30 minutes or so out of the day for YOU.

31. Play video games.

32. Text someone you haven't for a while.

And as always, making an appointment at Bailey's or another local counseling center is a must. Damn whatever stigma surrounds it, counselors are trained to help individuals for a reason. You'll feel better afterwards.


You're not alone. You matter. You've got your whole life to figure it all out.

always rooting for you,

Cover Image Credit: google images

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To The Friends I Won't Talk To After High School

I sincerely hope, every great quality I saw in you, was imprinted on the world.


So, for the last four years I’ve seen you almost everyday. I’ve learned about your annoying little brother, your dogs and your crazy weekend stories. I’ve seen you rock the awful freshman year fashion, date, attend homecoming, study for AP tests, and get accepted into college.

Thank you for asking me about my day, filling me in on your boy drama and giving me the World History homework. Thank you for complimenting my outfits, laughing at me presenting in class and listening to me complain about my parents. Thank you for sending me your Quizlets and being excited for my accomplishments- every single one of them. I appreciate it all because I know that soon I won’t really see you again. And that makes me sad. I’ll no longer see your face every Monday morning, wave hello to you in the hallways or eat lunch with you ever again. We won't live in the same city and sooner or later you might even forget my name.

We didn’t hang out after school but none the less you impacted me in a huge way. You supported my passions, stood up for me and made me laugh. You gave me advice on life the way you saw it and you didn’t have to but you did. I think maybe in just the smallest way, you influenced me. You made me believe that there’s lots of good people in this world that are nice just because they can be. You were real with me and that's all I can really ask for. We were never in the same friend group or got together on the weekends but you were still a good friend to me. You saw me grow up before your eyes and watched me walk into class late with Starbucks every day. I think people like you don’t get enough credit because I might not talk to you after high school but you are still so important to me. So thanks.

With that said, I truly hope that our paths cross one day in the future. You can tell me about how your brothers doing or how you regret the college you picked. Or maybe one day I’ll see you in the grocery store with a ring on your finger and I’ll be so happy you finally got what you deserved so many guys ago.

And if we ever do cross paths, I sincerely hope you became everything you wanted to be. I hope you traveled to Italy, got your dream job and found the love of your life. I hope you have beautiful children and a fluffy dog named Charlie. I hope you found success in love before wealth and I hope you depended on yourself for happiness before anything else. I hope you visited your mom in college and I hope you hugged your little sister every chance you got. She’s in high school now and you always tell her how that was the time of your life. I sincerely hope, every great quality I saw in you, was imprinted on the world.

And hey, maybe I’ll see you at the reunion and maybe just maybe you’ll remember my face. If so, I’d like to catch up, coffee?



Cover Image Credit: High school Musical

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Buying New Clothes Every Month Has Been The Key To Helping Me Become Happy With My Body Again

Loving my body in new outfits has boosted my self image so much.


Being body-positive has been really hard for me to do throughout 2019, despite there being an overwhelming surge in body-positivity around me, whether through my friends and family or YouTube. I look in the mirror and what I see is someone I want to make a jean size or two smaller like in the past. That being said, I've slowly been coming around to accepting the body I have now, instead of bashing it constantly. A key way I've come to accept the body I'm in now is through buying myself something new every month, like a new T-shirt or a pair of jeans or sneakers that help me see myself in a positive light. When I'm in a new outfit, I feel invincible. I don't think about how pudgy my stomach is, or about the hair I have growing in random places, like my neck or on my nose (yes, not just in, but ON too).

My bank account tends to suffer as of recently because of this, but it's worth it when I can genuinely feel good in what I am wearing every day. I like to wake up and think about how many outfits I can put together, ready to post my #OOTD for Snapchat without caring what anyone thinks. I've let social media dictate how I feel about myself more than I care to admit. I see how perfect all the models are in everything they're wearing from brands I know and love, yet when I try the same thing on, it's a whole different ugly story.

I don't enjoy trying things on to avoid the shame I feel when things don't fit me right, or if something that I thought would flatter me actually makes me look like a sack of potatoes. Instagram has really hurt my body image a lot — enough to make me delete it for a week after one post sent me spiraling. Going through those bumps made me finally realize it's not my fault if something doesn't fit. Sizes range depending on the item, it's the clothing items fault, not mine. Now that I see that, it's easier to brush off something not fitting me as it should. I know my size very well in the stores I frequent the most, so it's easier for me to pick out things I know will look good and not have to worry about the sizing issue.

Buying yourself something new is not something you should limit to every few months or longer. You shouldn't be afraid to go out of your comfort zone price wise every once and a while either. Coupons exist, stories always offer you them when you first sign up to receive emails and even texts. You can be crafty and still get a high price item for less. If you treat yourself to cheap things, you won't feel half as good as you want to. Granted, sticking to a limit is important but there's no shame in going over the limit every once and a while.

I love shopping as much as I love country music and writing short stories — a lot. Yes, I get yelled at almost every time I get something new. I need to save my money for important things, like for my sorority or for medical issues that could suddenly arise, or for utilities at my house next year off campus.

However, my mental well-being is not something I can ignore.

I can't push the good feelings aside to save 30 or 40 bucks a month. I don't want to feel as low as I've felt about myself anymore. I'm tired of feeling sad or angry at who I am, and I want to learn how to accept myself as I am. Buying myself something new, like clothes, is what offers a positive light to view myself under.

Whether you treat yourself to dinner at your favorite restaurant, or to face masks, or to a new movie when it comes out — don't be afraid to do it. Put yourself first and you'll realize your worth and how much you've been ignoring it in the face of poor confidence.

My confidence isn't back up to where it used to be, but it's getting there.

It may not be the most cash efficient method of self-love, but my body positivity is better than it was a few months ago. Aerie and American Eagle have really helped me become happier with my body, and I can't thank them enough for being more inclusive for people like me who are learning to love themselves again in a new body.

There is a light at the end of the tunnel for all of us hoping to promote our own body positivity, and it could all start with a simple purchase from your favorite store after you read this.

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