A homeless mother of two children may feel overwhelmed. She may also feel inadequate as a mother. Even worse, she may fear that the department of children and family services (DCFS) will take her children. What can she do in her current situation? The answer to part of the problem may be utilizing a safe family. Safe Families is a great program to help the mother and keep the children out of the foster system. I'm gonna give three solid reasons one should consider becoming a safe family.
1. The Parent's Perspective
In many cases, the parent is looking for a little bit of time to get their situation in order. For example, we are currently helping a mother who is in between jobs, and her new residency was not ready for her arrival. So she has been homeless. My wife and I are watching the youngest, and she has been such a joy to our family this week. If the mother tried doing it on her own, who knows if DCFS would get involved because of her current living situation. She didn't have family or close friends to call on for help. Since she utilized Safe Families, she can know that her kids are safe until her issues are resolved.
2. The Child's Perspective
Initially, some may have the thought "how terrifying it must be for the child to go into a stranger's home." I don't deny that it can be mildly traumatic or painful for a child to be separated (even if transiently) from his/her parent. However, in most cases I've encountered as a safe family or from other safe families, the children do exceptionally well. Approximately three years ago, Brittney and I took in two siblings whom I will name Melissa and Carter (for their protection). It was one of our first placements and a very memorable one. They were a little bit nervous at first, but after a short time they came into their own. They were telling us stories and had no qualms being comfortable with us. We found out real quick how resilient and strong children can be. Even in more uncomfortable situations, a child's outlook is much better not involved with DCFS.
3. The Safe Family's Perspective
The old proverb "It takes a village to raise a child" is not only a saying, it rings true. Instead of fostering the notion that we ought to be self-sufficient, we ought to encourage the idea of living as a true community. This manifests well through programs like Safe Families. We all go through a time when life doesn't make sense or luck just doesn't care about our circumstances. The idea of living as a community takes away much of the unnecessary pressures in life. It's hard enough to be a parent (or single parent, in many cases); I believe a healthy community works synergistically with its constituents. As we help each other, we all grow and progress.
