We've all seen the open letter, however, the different types we encounter range from seriously important to upsettingly irrelevant with many in between. What I haven't seen are any humorous open letters so I decided to create my own. I might even consider writing a full open letter of one of these headlines! Which one would YOU want to see me write?

1. An Open Letter To The Girl In The Library Who Dropped A Cheese Fry On The Floor And Still Ate It.

2. An Open Letter To My Mom Who Doesn't Let Me Win In Boardgames Anymore.

3. An Open Letter To Netflix: Why Do I Love You Yet You Are Directly Involved In My Demise?

4. An Open Letter To Pete: Miss Ya Bud.

5. An Open Letter To Mondays: F*** Off.

6. An Open Letter To Tuesdays: Ask Monday What The Deal Is.

7. An Open Letter To The Manager I Complained To About The Perfectly Acceptable Service I Received.

8. An Open Letter To My Grade School Girlfriend: I'm Sorry I Rubbed A Gluestick All Over Your Back To Get Your Attention.

9. An Open Letter To Aliens: I Know You Don't Hang Out With Us Because We Aren't Cool Enough.

10. An Open Letter To The Woman I Waved Back To Who Was Actually Waving To Her Friends Behind Me.

11. An Open Letter To Virgins Who Keep A Condom In Their Wallet: It's Not Going To Happen In Between Running Errands.

12. An Open Letter To Coffee: You've Made A Really Meaningful Impact On My Life That I Won't Soon Forget.

13. An Open Letter To Rappers: Slow Down I Can't Understand You.

14. An Open Letter To My Dog Who I Never Adopted: I Probably Would Have Called You Fredrick.

15. An Open Letter To My Spam Folder: Who Is Spreading The Rumor That I Have Erectile Dysfunction?

16. An Open Letter To Ice Cube Trays: Keep Up The 'Solid' Work.

17. An Open Letter To Professional Cup Stackers: How Has The Fame Affected You?

18. An Open Letter To Fidget Spinners: You're Just A Yo-Yo Without A String.

19. An Open Letter To The Beggar Who Asked Me For Money Then Eventually Just Walked Away Because I Asked Him Too Many Questions.

20. An Open Letter To The People At Sears Who Saw Me Turn Around And Accidentally Start Talking To A Mannequin.

21. An Open Letter To The Stranger Who Said To Me, 'Hey The 90's Called, They Want Their Doc Martens Back'.

22. An Open Letter To The Chipotle Employee Who Offered To Double Wrap My Burrito Even Though It Didn't Tear.

23. An Open Letter To Libraries: I Want To Be Inside Of You.

24. An Open Letter To The Flat Earth Society: What Do You Expect Me To Do With All Of My Globes?

25. An Open Letter To Dentists: Have You Ever Dropped The Scrapey Thing In Someone's Mouth?

26. An Open Letter To People Who Say 'Hang Loose' And 'Heard That'.

27. An Open Letter To The Government: You Can't Take My Guns Away, I Don't Have Any.

28. An Open Letter To People Who Say Grief Makes You Stronger: No, It Makes You Sadder.

29. An Open Letter To Girls That 'Love' The Beatles But Don't Know Who John Lennon, George Harrison, Ringo Starr, Or Paul McCartney Are.

As I wait for The Onion to contact me with a job offer, in the meantime and in between time I'd like to offer my services in humor to anyone who enjoys reading things that are funny.