"Healing is hard. It is a process. It comes in waves with euphoric highs and devastating lows. Within these 24 hours, I came to understand healing on another level. I began to understand the work that I have done, continue to do, and still needs to be done. But really, is our healing ever done? "

I recently completed my Yoga of 12-Step Recovery (Y12SR) Certification. I am now able to lead Y12SR meetings and work with individuals in active addiction and recovery. The whole certification was 24 hours. Six hours of an online intensive and eighteen hours of a weekend workshop. It was 24 hours of learning, practicing, observing, understanding. It was a lot of science and even more philosophy. And before I could even begin to understand these concepts and apply them to others, I needed to understand the concepts in application to myself.

The very first night of training, in probably about the first hour or so, the leader said, "Pay attention to how you feel this weekend. Watch what comes up and how you react." Before I had even entered the training that evening, I was already making plans to fill every ounce of free time I had with something to do. This was after stating the whole week leading up to this training, "This weekend is going to be all about self-care and rest." Anyone else fill time so they can avoid processing their feelings? Cause I am guilty as charged. And that is exactly what I did before I could actually understand why I was doing it. I crawled over to my phone in my bag and cancelled my spin classes and rowing classes because things were about to get real real and I wanted to feel all of it rather than run from it.

The 24 hours did not happen in a cycle of a day. They occurred over course of months. When I was half way across the world, when I was sitting in my home with a journal and a pen, when I was sitting on a couch wrapped in a fluffy towel in an AirBnB in the suburbs of Cleveland. There were moments when I felt like I was being ripped open and put back together within the same moment. It was not just 24 hours of training I can now publish on my Yoga Alliance profile. It was 24 hours of understanding. Myself. Others. The world around me. It was understanding and discovery that was facilitated for me in which I hope to facilitate for others.

What are the three most important things to you? What is your intention for taking this training? Two very important questions asked of us. So what were my answers…

Important things to me: Human connection and communication. Most important things to me. My intention: Be a lighthouse. Spread the light. Deepen my understanding of myself and the world around me so I can facilitate deeper connections for others within themselves.

So, what exactly do I understand after these 24 hours?

Understanding is a process with no definitive end. There is always more to learn, discover and digest.
Healing is not linear.
Recognition is the first step in breaking the cycle of perpetual suffering.

When is the last time you took 24 hours in an attempt to better understand?