22 Thoughts Every College Tour Guide Has | The Odyssey Online
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22 Thoughts Every College Tour Guide Has

And on your right is the library, where you will spend your time thinking about doing homework, but really checking your Facebook.

Emily Schario
Oct 12, 2015
Stonehill College
17
22 Thoughts Every College Tour Guide Has
UMASS

1. Hmm... is it a pants or skirt day? Let me check the weather.


2. 30 mph gusts of wind? Pants it is. Can't have families seeing any of that.


3. Ugh, why did I go to that party last night when I have a morning tour...


4. Get it together dammit! You are the poster child for this school!


5. Alright, here we go, 'bout to give these people the best tour of their lives.


6. Oh s**t, I forgot my name tag.


7. "Hi! I'm a sophomore Communications major, and I'm involved in blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah."


8. Wow, that joke I just made was hilarious. *Internally high fives self*


9. Wait...why is no one laughing...


10. Let the walking backwards commence.


11. Oh no...stairs...


12. I swear if I run into one of my friends and they ask me what I did last night...


13. Wow! Thank you so much for standing right in the middle of the walkway where our tour is going!


14. Alright, so does anyone have any questions? Oh, you want to know what the party scene is like?


15. Oh yeah, the communal bathrooms aren't that bad...


16. What do I do on the weekends? Is this a rhetorical question?


17. No ma'am, I can't tell you how to fill out the FAFSA, but I can tell you that the library is opened 24/7 during finals week. That's useful information, right?


18. Oh god...I felt a rain drop...


19. One...more...building...


20. This family is offering me a tip right now...I can't...I really can't...


21. Well, that's it, folks! Oh please, hold your applause!


22. Crushed it once again. They're all applying early decision after that one.


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