Hour-long ballet classes are home to some of the world's greatest emotional roller coasters. So buckle up and let's run through the many thoughts had during ballet class:
1. Why do I always eat right before attempting to pull on this leotard?
Maybe I'll just keep my warm-up jacket on the whole time. Also, I'm still hungry.
2. If my hair could resemble a bun today, that’d be great.
Maybe these two hair nets and a pound of hairspray will do the trick.
3. I need to be there a few minutes early so I can grab my favorite spot at the barre.
I've succumbed to the culture of being territorial over the prime barre spots.
4. If I just flash a cheesy smile, maybe no one will realize that I completely forgot the combination.
Grin and bear it; just keep going.
5. Someday, I’m going to be as classy and poised as this ballerina instructor.
Seriously, she's fabulous and still dancing like a pro.
6. This stretch is never ending.
In with the good air, out with the bad. Relax and try not to show the struggle.
7. I wish I was still as flexible as I was in elementary school.
Kids can just whack their limbs wherever and their bodies don't kill them for it the next day. Lucky.
8. Wow, look at that tendu.
Pointed and turned out and looking like a professional.
9. I’m practically a professional ballerina.
Just kidding, I just fell out of a double pirouette. Oops. But believing it is half the battle, right?
10. I’d give anything for a gallon of water right now.
Am I in the middle of class or the middle of the Sahara desert?
11. Sweat is just tangible evidence of passion and dedication... right?
I bet that even principal dancers at the American Ballet Theater sweat.
12. I think my arms are going to fall off.
If I hold them in second position any longer, they may not survive the class. I bet weightlifters would be impressed by my stamina.
13. I’m currently willing my legs to magically extend up to my face.
Mind over matter makes the dream work.
14. Has my leg been shaking like that the whole time?
It is the equivalent of a leaf on a tree on a windy day during an earthquake.
15. CRAMP.
16. Stretching at barre for adagio!
Seriously, this is the best gift ever, and it's not even my birthday.
17. Oh hey, I recognize this piece of classical music.
It's a rare occurrence, but sometimes, the pianist covers a current or otherwise popular song during class.
18. Oops, wrong arm positioning; just keep jumping and no one will notice.
When in doubt, just hold them in first position.
19. Yet I can’t wait to do this again next class.
It's definitely an addiction, and I thoroughly enjoy being sore the day after, anyway.
20. I feel so athletic and strong.
21. I feel so inflexible and weak.
22. Reverence and clapping.
Finally.
