Turning 21 is a big step in every young adult's life. It's the "official" christening into adulthood—because everyone knows 18 isn't good for much, except for like voting and all that other important stuff. 21 means a lot of different things. It means a new license, a trip to Vegas, being charged as an adult for various crimes and most importantly, legally enjoying a lot of alcohol. Unfortunately, this day seems to come sooner for some than others.
That's right, I'm talking to all you people out there who are the last ones in the friend group to turn the big 2 1. The ones with the late birthdays, the ones I can unfortunately relate to all too well. This one is for you. Hopefully you too can relate to these 21 thoughts when you're the last one to turn 21:
1. "Sure I can sober drive tonight... and every other night of the week for approximately three more months."
2. "I'd love to go out with you guys and be your designated driver for the millionth time!"
3. "Another weekend, another underage rage I'm dying to attend. Not."
4. "I need to start charging people per mile. Maybe I'll put Uber out of business?"
5. "Ew, Burnett's? That's like so freshman year."
6. "I'm sick and tired of hanging out with these immature and highly unsophisticated underclassmen... that I basically still am myself."
7. "No, you don't need to ID me sir. I'll just take a water."
8. "Yeah, I'll take a kid's menu while you're at it, thanks."
9. "If you puke in my car, I will kill you."
10. "Please keep telling me how to drive, drunk person. I like totally trust your judgment."
11. "Please also keep trying to give me the incorrect directions. It's past midnight and you're six shots deep, you know nothing."
12. "I don't care how many times you call me at three in the morning, I am so over coming to pick you up."
13. "Yeah, I'll definitely be at the bar this weekend! Outside. In my car. Waiting for six of my closest friends to pile in."
14. "Look, if I'm going to drive you halfway around the city at all hours of the early morning, the least you could do is buy me a Happy Meal."
15. "Wait... so you're not going to the bar this weekend? Does this mean I get my friend back for an entire 48 hours?"
16. "No, I'm not 21. I'm also not 12, so you can stop talking to me like a child now."
17. "If one more person tells me how bad it sucks to not be 21 yet, I'm going to strangle someone."
18. "No, I had no idea how cool last night was! I wasn't there, remember?"
19. "I really could care less about how disgusting the bathrooms at the bar were, or how dirty your shoes are from the mystery sludge on the floor. Next subject, please."
20. "Hmm, when I turn 21, do I want those big bubble balloons to be silver or gold?"
21. "Let the countdown begin. We're in the double digits now, baby."
