It May Be 2017, But Chivalry Is Not Dead

It May Be 2017, But Chivalry Is Not Dead

Wait for the butterflies, I promise it's worth it.
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I know with the Feminist movement and "women power" struggles, the last thing on the mind of the majority of women in today's society would be chivalry. I mean why would a man need to hold the door open for a woman anyway, they can do it themselves and on and on go the sayings.

Now, I'm not here to tell you whether or not you should believe in or follow these movements; I'm simply here to tell you that amidst the controversy in today's society, chivalry has not died, it just takes a certain someone to prove it to you.

First, you may be asking yourself what exactly is chivalry?

Chivalry consists of "courteous behavior of a man towards a woman" and would include door holding, calling instead of texting, asking a woman out on real dates, walking her up to her doorstep, genuine compliments, and no expectations of sex.

Yes, all of the things listed above may be considered "old-fashioned" and many would argue that men with those qualities don't exist anymore; however, I don't agree, I simply believe that these men are harder to find, and I can guarantee you that you won't be meeting them at a club anytime soon.

If you're still reading, I'm assuming you're like me, a woman who dreams to have both a loving and caring man who would be my best friend, love me for who I am, continually challenge me to be a better person, and one who doesn't forget about the "little things" such as the door holding, the sweet genuine compliments, and the real dates. And although hard to find, I can promise you it still exists because I've seen it firsthand.

As cheesy as this is about to sound, about a month ago a man I had gone to school with, called me out of the blue and asked me out on a date, a real date, the kind where you go to a sit-down restaurant and talk for hours on end. He picked me up from my house and actually knocked on my door without a text saying "I'm here". When we got to the restaurant he went out of his way to open both doors for me and even stopped me when I tried too. After dinner, he walked me up to my door where I invited him inside and not for sex I might add, but instead to meet my family and he happily agreed. After a few hours of laughs and great conversations, the night was over and he hugged me goodnight, and the hug was all I needed. So needless to say, my smile and facial expressions showed it all-- chivalry was not dead and courteous men still existed, they just appear in the places and at the times you don't expect them too.

So ladies if you're looking for that "old-fashioned" sort of love that gives you butterflies and makes you smile from ear to ear, don't settle because chivalry is not dead, it's simply a little harder to find, but once you do, I promise it's worth it, don't lose hope.

Cover Image Credit: Unsplash

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3 Reasons Why Step Dads Are Super Dads

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I often hear a lot of people complaining about their step-parents and wondering why they think that they have any authority over them. Although I know that everyone has different situations, I will be the first to admit that I am beyond blessed to have a step dad. Yep, I said it. My life wouldn't be the same that it is not without him in it. Let me tell you why I think step dads are the greatest things since sliced bread.

1. They will do anything for you, literally.

My stepdad has done any and every thing for me. From when I was little until now. He was and still is my go-to. If I was hungry, he would get me food. If something was broken, he would fix it. If I wanted something, he would normally always find a way to get it. He didn't spoil me (just sometimes), but he would make sure that I was always taken care of.

SEE ALSO: The Thank You That Step-Parents Deserve

2. Life lessons.

Yup, the tough one. My stepdad has taught me things that I would have never figured out on my own. He has stood beside me through every mistake. He has been there to pick me up when I am down. My stepdad is like the book of knowledge: crazy hormonal teenage edition. Boy problems? He would probably make me feel better. He just always seemed to know what to say. I think that the most important lesson that I have learned from my stepdad is: to never give up. My stepdad has been through three cycles of leukemia. He is now in remission, yay!! But, I never heard him complain. I never heard him worry and I never saw him feeling sorry for himself. Through you, I found strength.

3. He loved me as his own.

The big one, the one that may seem impossible to some step parents. My stepdad is not actually my stepdad, but rather my dad. I will never have enough words to explain how grateful I am for this man, which is why I am attempting to write this right now. It takes a special kind of human to love another as if they are their own. There had never been times where I didn't think that my dad wouldn't be there for me. It was like I always knew he would be. He introduces me as his daughter, and he is my dad. I wouldn't have it any other way. You were able to show me what family is.

So, dad... thanks. Thanks for being you. Thanks for being awesome. Thanks for being strong. Thanks for loving me. Thanks for loving my mom. Thanks for giving me a wonderful little sister. Thanks for being someone that I can count on. Thanks for being my dad.

I love you!

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The Truth: About Domestic Violence

You can survive this.

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Let me tell you a story about a girl who has a history with domestic violence, not only as a victim but as the perpetrator. Now, this girl is not proud of what she's done but the stories a little more complicated than she would like to admit. When the girl was fifteen she was with someone she loved more than anything in the world there was a dark side to this love, secrecy not only from each partner but from the world and this angered her so one day to be particular the first day of junior year in front an auditorium full of her peers slapped her beloved, whether this was from pain or anger it was wrong from start to finish.

Eventually, they broke up she found a man who lives close to her and seemed to be just as submissive as she had dreamed he would be. It seems like a perfect match, the type of personality with the relaxed go with the flow type of man but soon the love turned sour. She became controlling out of fear of abandonment, this relationship was her world and everybody knew it and most of the relationship was allegedly smooth sailing with the slight undertone of emotional abuse coming from her of course because she didn't know anything better. Then the day came where things ended, where things took a violent turn in front of witnesses like never before.

Grabbed by the throat, to shut her up was his goal but all it did this make her scream louder and then he pushed, pushed her right down the stairs, kicked her out and slam the door in her face. She loved him how could he do this to her? She asked herself what she had done wrong, was she not pretty enough, not kind enough and just plain not enough for the love of her life. Things don't stop here after the relationship ended, she went on a wild spree trying to find solace in the arms of another, with men who manhandled her who saw her as no more than an object.

But how could she blame them when that's all she saw herself as, she had been told over and over that should only be wanted for her body and she thought that they were right for years and it tore her apart and honestly a lot of things were sour from the start but she didn't care, she deserved this she thought. By age 18 she entered the relationship that set her off, things would never be the same, he belittled her every day for a year and a half after she had devoted herself to him almost immediately but she did not see his faults but her family sure did. This thankfully ended but the story doesn't end here. She was later sexually assaulted while unconscious on two separate occasions and she felt this would never end but here she stands strong as ever with all of it behind her and a story to tell.

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