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Health and Wellness

20 Stages Of A Period Every Girl Experiences

Making jokes about menstrual cycles are not funny. Period.

Alexis Napoli

Mar 06, 2017

Manhattanville College

20 Stages Of A Period Every Girl Experiences

InsideHigherEd

Every month women go through a week of hell when our uterus has a Texas Chainsaw Massacre going on down there. I say this in the nicest way possible, but it is gross. When I say "gross," I mean we are wonderfully disgusting. To accurately describe what women go through, these 20 images should paint the picture for you. Let's find humor in our tragedy ladies!

1. Pre-period cramps are the start of it

These are such a tease.

2. Some of us get our periods early

I wasn't prepared for this! Now I have to change my outfit and go to the store and buy tampons!

3. Some of us get it late

Always ready to jump to conclusions, even after only being late by one day.

4. And some of us get it on time

#blessed

5. Then you actually get your period

Fair warning, stay away!

6. And you become an emotional wreck

One second you're happy and then you're sad.

7. And then you become angry about everything

Uh oh...

8. Then you consume everything in sight

And you are happy again... but not for long.

9. And become so bloated

Me: I'm not that bloated Inner Me: You're fatter than a cow

10. And nothing fits

*Wears same two pairs of sweats and leggings all week*

11. And you have to avoid whites and bright colored clothes

All black everything or nothing.

12. And you can't get comfortable at night

Cranky B alert!

13. There's always a risk of staining your underwear

You got this girl. Legs closed tight together and waddle your way to the bathroom.

14. And don't even get me started on your mortal enemy: sneezing

Damn it! Not again!

15. But don't forget about your pimples

They're the worst. They spawn on your face, chest, and even down under. Ugh.

16. At the end of the week, sometimes we think our periods are over

It's too good to be true.

17. And then...

They're not.

18. When they finally end, we couldn't be happier

Happy dance your butt off!

19. Sometimes people get lucky and their period ends before an important event

This never happens for me...

20. And then there are people who barely experience any of these symptoms...

Screw you.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

Lifestyle

Cool Off with These 8 Beers!

North Carolina State University

781

Summer is hot and humid, and it's almost like summer was made specifically to drink the refreshing, cold, crisp wonderful, delicious, nutritious nectar of the gods. Which is none other than beer; wonderful cold beer. With summer playing peek-a-boo around the corner while we finish up this semester, it's time to discuss the only important part of summer. And if you haven't already guessed, it's beer. There are few things I take more seriously than my beer, in order are: sports... and beer. Here are my favorite summer brews:

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beer

Lifestyle

New England Summers Are The BEST Summers

Why you should spend your next summer in New England.

Saint Joseph's University

5397

www.flickr.com

Three years ago, I chose to attend college in Philadelphia, approximately 360 miles away from my small town in New Hampshire. I have learned many valuable lessons away from home, and have thoroughly enjoyed my time spent in Pennsylvania. One thing that my experience has taught me, however, is that it is absolutely impossible to beat a New England summer.

You cannot beat the beach. Believe it or not (which many people may not), New England has a long and beautiful coastline. Most of my high school summers were spent sitting on the Wall at Hampton Beach, getting sunburnt and eating Acai bowls from The Secret Spot. The Wall was the place to be both during the day and at night. We begin our days there with a KB's bagel and coffee, and end them with pizza and ice cream. It’s not a New England summer without that 4 p.m. text from someone, “Who wants to meet at the Wall tonight?” Nighttime is for Tripoli’s Pizza, the sound of waves, and wishes on shooting stars. Wednesday nights are especially important, as those are the nights that Hampton Beach sets off the weekly firework display.

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Recommended for you

20 Stages Of A Period Every Girl Experiences

Making jokes about menstrual cycles are not funny. Period.

1. Pre-period cramps are the start of it

2. Some of us get our periods early

3. Some of us get it late

4. And some of us get it on time

5. Then you actually get your period

6. And you become an emotional wreck

7. And then you become angry about everything

8. Then you consume everything in sight

9. And become so bloated

10. And nothing fits

11. And you have to avoid whites and bright colored clothes

12. And you can't get comfortable at night

13. There's always a risk of staining your underwear

14. And don't even get me started on your mortal enemy: sneezing

15. But don't forget about your pimples

16. At the end of the week, sometimes we think our periods are over

17. And then...

18. When they finally end, we couldn't be happier

19. Sometimes people get lucky and their period ends before an important event

20. And then there are people who barely experience any of these symptoms...

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Cool Off with These 8 Beers!

Coors Light Summer Brew:

Leinenkugel Summer Shandy

Leinenkugel Sunset Wheat

Sam Adams Summer Ale

Hell or High Watermelon

Blue Moon Summer Honey

LandShark Lager

Corona

75 degrees and sunny, plus, no humidity. I mean do I really need to say more?

Perfect Weather

You'll get an effortless tan

You can exercise with a view

You don't have to worry about bug bites

In n Out all day, every day

We have outdoor concerts

We live where people vacation

Because let's be honest, we all use lyrics.

1. “Don’t get too close, it’s dark inside. It's where my demons hide.”

2. “Tonight, we are young.”

3. “Cuz I may be bad, but I’m perfectly good at it.”

4. “Tell me how they got that pretty little face on that pretty little frame.”

5. “I can’t wait to fall in love with you, you can’t wait to fall in love with me.”

6. “Sweatpants, hair tied, chillin with no makeup on.”

7. “Why you so obsessed with me?”

8. “We ain’t ever getting older.”

9. “I didn’t know that I was starving until I tasted you.”

10. “Didn’t they tell you I’m a savage?"

11. “I’m gonna make you miss me.”

12. "Cheers to the freakin weekend.”

13. “Love’s a game. Wanna play?”

14. “You don’t know about me, but I bet you want to.”

15. “Let’s set each other’s lonely nights, Be each other’s paradise.”

16. “Trippin’ on skies, sippin’ waterfalls."

17. “Wish we could turn back time, to the good old days.”

18. “But you will remember me for centuries.”

19. “Something about you makes me feel like a dangerous woman."

20. “Don’t act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me.”

21. “Darling, I’m a nightmare dressed like a daydream.”

22. “Find me where the wild things are.”

23. “I’m high on lovin’ you.”

24. “If you’re gonna be somebody’s heartbreak, somebody’s mistake, if you’re gonna be somebody’s first time, somebody’s last time, be mine.”

25. “Don’t be afraid to take the road less traveled on.”

Everything Bruce says in his classic rock songs.

1. "Talk about a dream Try to make it real You wake up in the night With a fear so real Spend your life waiting For a moment that just don't come Well don't waste your time waiting." (Badlands)

2. "It's a town full of losers/ I'm pulling out of here to win" (Thunder Road)

3. "You've got to learn to live with what you can't rise above" (Tunnel of Love)

4. "I got something in my heart/ I been waitin' to give/ I got a life I wanna start/ One I been waitin' to live" (Leah)

5. “God have mercy on the man/ Who doubts what he’s sure of” (Brilliant Disguise)

7. “Is a dream a lie when it don’t come true, or is it something worse?” (The River)

Why you should spend your next summer in New England.

Want to know more about summer destinations?

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1. "Talk about a dream
Try to make it real
You wake up in the night
With a fear so real
Spend your life waiting
For a moment that just don't come
Well don't waste your time waiting." (Badlands)