It's that time of the year again. The time where businesses aggressively market pumpkin products. The time where there are no limits. Some are hits, some are misses.
1. Whey Blend
I do appreciate this breaking the basic white girl stereotype. I honestly didn't know whey blends had flavors.
2. Pudding
Can we talk about how amazing this is? It's a pumpkin pie without the need to bake. I don't have time to bake. I don't even have an oven.
3. Beef Jerky
This is the most offensive thing I've ever seen online.
4. Buttery Spread
This really changes the bagel game.
5. Hummus
I don't know much about Mediterranean/North African/Middle Eastern cultures, but I feel like this is an unconventional flavor to dip raw vegetables or pita chips in.
6. Peeps
Peeps suck. They really do. It's a gelatinous sugar covered in more sugar. Nothing can save it, not even pumpkin spice.
7. Mini-Wheats Cereal
I really don't see a better way to get my whole grains in for the day than with this cereal.
8. Milk
The only way to earn my respect is to pour this into your pumpkin spice Mini-Wheats.
9. Coconut Milk
The second way to earn my respect is to pour this into your pumpkin spice Mini-Wheats.
10. Oreos
Freshman year, my aunt sent me these in the mail. I offered one to a guy on my floor and he refused because he "isn't a basic white girl." I'm still not over this.
11. Sausage
There are many unappetizing things on this list but I am truly disgusted.
12. Spice
Isn't pumpkin spice just cinnamon and nutmeg? I don't understand.
13. Bisque
"Bisque" makes me think of lobster bisque and the thought of lobster combined with pumpkin is making me dry heave.
14. Some Spread and Peanut Butter Hybrid Thing
I want to bathe in this.
15. Pringles
Pringles has also sold grilled shrimp flavored chips so this is pretty tame in comparison.
16. Salmon
A fish died to be disrespected like this.
17. Moustache Wax
To set the season for No Shave November.
18. Fries
I mean honestly why not? Salmon is on this list. We have no boundaries anymore. Nothing is sacred.
19. Kale Chips
Just because you can, doesn't mean you should.
20. Four Loko
Mistakes know no season.