In the months before reaching the third decade of my life, I have definitely given a bit of thought to the “life lessons” I have learned thus far. Looking back a year ago, a memory that many of my peers discuss, I cannot even believe how different I am now.
I have rounded up 20 lessons that I have learned now that I am 20 and they are ones that I believe we can all benefit from, especially in the society we live in today. There is so much stress placed on grades, being a role model for others that are younger, and achieving so much in such a small amount of time. There isn't nearly enough time to do everything that we want to, which is why this is the time to remember to live in the moment and not dwell on the past or control your path in the future. It is hard enough being this age, so take the time to breathe and remember a couple of these…
1.You know who your true friends are.
Your freshman roommates may not always be your lifelong friends, and, trust me, I could on with the rest of my life without talking to some of those who I thought were my ride or dies for a good portion of my life. You will feel it in your heart who your true friends are. They will be the ones who drop everything to be with you when you are crying, the ones who laugh with you when your ex downgrades, and the ones who get far too tipsy with you while watching a rom-com. You will know who they are when they come into your life.
2.Grades aren’t the depending factor in life.
Grades are just numbers. Remember that. They aren’t the numbers on your social security card or your insurance card. They are numbers that are given out. And if you go to a big school, sometimes that is all you are anyways, a number. It isn't worth stressing out over a two digit number that is placed on the top of a paper in red, especially when it doesn’t even contribute to your major.
3.Take the time to do what you want to do, whether it be take time off from school, travel, or pick up a new pastime.
Go abroad. Take a semester off. Do what makes you happy and don’t listen to anyone else. If it sets your soul on fire to play the guitar, to visit every single state, then go for it. Nothing is stopping you except yourself.
4.If you are struggling, ask for help.
This is a big one. It is never too late to ask for help, but please do so. You will never regret asking for help from those who love you. Believe me, they want to help.
5. People are mean. There is nothing else to that and that will never change.
This one goes without comment. Regardless, life goes on and you cannot change people.
6. The only people you can truly count on in life are your family.
Be honest with your family and let them in. They will be your forever allies, friends, and partners.
7.With that being said, yes, your parents have been and will always be right.
It wasn’t until about a year ago that this one clicked with me. Yes, it is hard to admit, but parents know us better than we know ourselves and it is just a lesson in life we are bound to learn at some point.
8.Take pictures and take lots of them.
Memories are the most beautiful and most natural gift we have in this world. Take advantage of them and embed them both physically and mentally.
9.Your first love may not always end up being your only love.
Learning to cope with loving someone else is hard. It is harder when it doesn't last, but the sun will still come up the next morning and it will set that evening. Life does go on.
10. There is a difference between loving someone and being in love with them.
Being infatuated with someone is a real and fun feeling, but being in love is an entirely different level. Some people fall in love multiple times, others only once. But it is important to know the difference between the two before making any sort of commitment.
11. And that person may not always love you back.
Break up’s suck, heartbreaks make you feel like nothing else will ever compare to the hurt that you feel in that moment, and people come in go like there is no tomorrow. This one is important to keep in mind, as like I mentioned, life does go on and it is up to you to find peace with the hurt. Regardless, it is more than okay to take all the time you need to heal.
12. Have that second doughnut or another glass of wine.
Stay up all night and sleep all day the next day. Who cares? Get this stuff out of the way before the real world slaps you in the face. You will thank yourself for the fun you allowed yourself to have one day.
13. Reading is always a good idea.
Getting lost in literature is an escape from the real world, even only if for a few hours or a few days.
14. Take the time in the morning to look decent for you and only you.
While you never know who you will run into, look good for yourself. Don’t let anyone judge you for wearing too much makeup or too little. If you feel good in how you look, walk out of the house and don’t look back.
15. It actually doesn't matter where you go to school.
Unless you are attending Harvard or Brown, no one cares about where you got your undergraduate degree. So, take pride in wherever you go to school. You chose it for a reason and embrace that reason.
16. Take the opportunity to see new places.
If there is a new coffee shop in town, a new clothing store, take the chance to go see it. It could light up your day simply just to see a new place that you aren’t used to. A new setting is always a good foundation for a peace of mind.
17. A blank journal is one of the best forms of therapy.
Write down what you liked about today and what you didn’t like. Make lists. Write short stories and poems. Whatever fuels your creativity, write it down. You can look back in a year or two and see how much you have grown from simply just examining your own words.
18. It is okay to be confident.
Don’t let anyone ever tell you that you can’t be confident in yourself. Be proud of your accomplishments and take pride in everything that you wish to do. However, do not be boastful. It never leads to any good.
19. Take the long way home. Always.
You may see a field of flowers you haven't before, or a place that just so happens to sell your favorite kind of tea. Taking your time is always the right thing to do. Rushing only leads to more stress.
20. Don’t have too many expectations.
If you don’t have expectations, you will never be disappointed. Let life run it’s course and sit back and enjoy the journey it takes you on. Don’t try to control it.
