Since my 19th birthday was last Wednesday, I wanted to reflect on some of the various things I have learned throughout my life. Whether it be truths about growing up, tips on friendship, or what is or isn’t worth worrying about, it is safe to say that this journey into adulthood did not lack important lessons and moments. I’m sure this list could go on forever, but here are 19 examples that stand out to me:
1. Trying new things isn't the worst thing in the world.
Ever since I was little, I’ve had a fear of trying new things: eating new foods, meeting new people, or visiting new places. In conquering my fear, I’ve learned that some of the best things come out of it. People are not kidding when they tell you “you’re missing out!”
2. You don't always get as much as you give in a friendship.
While everyone has different expectations of what a sincere friendship should be, I think we all agree that it’s a “two-way street.” No one likes to put in so much effort only to get less in return. Unfortunately, I’ve learned that this does happen sometimes in friendships – actually, a little too many times.
3. You can't keep yourself from growing up... completely.
As much as I hate to admit it, we have to grow up. We will all age physically, and while we can hold on to some childish habits, we do have gain maturity. There are not many ways to avoid “adulting.”
4. Hear other people out.
Sometimes, hearing opposing points of view can be really beneficial. I’m a very stubborn person, so this is not my favorite thing to do, but I have found that it’s much better to listen and consider other people’s opinions than to dismiss them entirely.
5. Don't limit your imagination.
Ambition can sometimes be dangerous, but there’s no harm in dreaming big and letting your imagination roam free. Doing this will restore your faith in the saying “anything is possible.”
6. It costs nothing to be nice.
I’ve just never seen the reward in being mean to other people. In every situation, there is a choice of whether or not to make someone upset, and it seems that making people upset actually takes more effort than being polite and considerate.
7. Don't give people too many chances.
People change, but not that much. If someone treats you poorly, it’s probable that they will again. It’s okay to give people a second chance, but don’t let yourself become a doormat.
8. Some people DO understand what you're going through.
We’ve all said, “you just don’t understand” when someone is trying to help us, but trust me, some people actually do get it. In most of our struggles, we aren’t alone whether we know it or not.
9. Sometimes hard work doesn't pay off, but it's okay.
You study really hard for an exam, but still don’t get the grade you wanted. This isn’t the only time this will happen, but it’s okay. Other factors may be at play, or maybe you just need to use a different approach.
10. It's okay to like things that most people don't like. It's also okay to like things that everyone likes.
Yeah, a lot of things are called “basic” these days but don’t give up your pumpkin spice lattes just because you don’t want to be like everyone else. Liking things because they are YOUR interests is what makes you unique.
11. Learn from your mistakes - no excuses.
When you make a mistake, which you will, try to find something to learn from it. It’s hard not to beat yourself up over it, but this is a sure fire way to make fewer mistakes in the future.
12. Don't take anything you have for granted.
What seems like nothing to you may be everything to someone else. Try to be grateful for every single happy detail of your life because it’ll help you be a more positive person overall.
13. You don't need to party and get drunk to have fun.
I found a great group of friends that know how to have fun without drinking or partying, and I feel like we are a lot closer because of it. Not every social gathering has to involve these kinds of things, I assure you.
14. Societal standards are always changing.
“As they say in fashion: one day you’re in, the next day you’re out” – Heidi Klum
Don’t pay much mind to make yourself fit these standards because they will probably be different in a year, maybe even in a few months.
15. Intelligence can be measured in an infinite number of ways.
Why are people who are good at math, smart, and those who aren’t, dumb? Someone can be advanced in one subject, and have a tough time with another. Not to mention, while some people are not book smart, they can still be extremely intelligent in other domains.
16. One size definitely does not fit all.
Oh, how I wish clothing companies would understand this! That’s all I’ve got to say…
17. You don't have to know what you want to be when you grow up right now.
We constantly get asked this question throughout our entire lives, and I used to feel bad saying that I don’t know. I soon found out that it’s not uncommon to pursue a job after college that has nothing to do with your major. So many people I know are grown adults and still have no idea!
18. Nothing is a bigger hindrance than yourself.
Of course, that are some external forces that can bar you from achieving something, but I’d like to argue that the thing that’s most often holding you back is yourself. In the past 19 years, I’ve been learning to get out of my own way, because the real, genuine, me was sitting there waiting to be set free.
19. A lot of good things come to an end.
I thought this would be fitting for the end of my list…
This applies to a wide variety of things, from major parts of our life, like high school or college, to simpler, more minor events, like the end of our favorite TV shows. It doesn’t mean we can’t look at old yearbook photos, or re-watch some of our favorite episodes, though.
