17. Doing something else while you're driving.

This is basically the mother of all annoying driving habits. I get it; you're running late, and you need to put on makeup/eat/call your doctor. But if you do it while you're driving, I won't feel bad when your mascara wand is sticking out of your eye. #sorrynotsorry

16. Texting at a stoplight, and not noticing when it turns green.

Because we should all have to wait for you to finish your conversation.

15. Using your high beams when someone is right in front of you, or right behind you.

No, really, it's fine. I like not being able to see! Keep it up!

14. Not allowing people in the merge lane to merge.

I'm not talking about not being able to let someone over, I'm talking about actively cutting people off in the merge lane.

13. Throwing stuff out the window.

So you'd rather put your trash on the Earth than in your car until you can get to a proper trashcan? That makes sense.

12. Swerving.

I am so sorry that the entire world is too slow and inconvenient for your needs. Please feel free to figure skate around all of us.

11. Honking unnecessarily.

There's an appropriate time to honk, and many more appropriate times to keep your rage contained to your car. Honking in traffic is the driving equivalent of throwing a tantrum in public for no good reason... we're all annoyed by the situation, but your laying on your horn won't make it better.

10. Breaking suddenly, for no reason.

Did you see a red light? A stop sign? A deer? No? Then don't brake.

9. Driving slowly in the left lane.

You know where's a good place to drive under the speed limit? The right lane. The people who do this are almost exclusively old women, and you can only see the puff of their hair, just barely peeking over the steering wheel, as you speed past them on their right.

8. Speeding in the right lane.

You know where's a good place to speed? The left lane. And you know what's even better? Getting mad at the people who are driving slowly in the slow lane.

7. Stopping at a yield during a highway merge.

Let's go over what merge means: to integrate yourself with traffic. Now let's be clear: stopping does not integrate you, and going from a dead stop to the speed of highway traffic in seconds is both unsafe and inconvenient.

6. Not turning your turn signal off after you merge.

Are you still moving over, are you forgetful, orrrrrr?

5. Not using a turn signal at all.

They're not, like, LEGALLY REQUIRED or anything. Anyway, are we supposed to know where you're intending to go? No. The answer is no.

4. Not knowing what "alternate right of way" means.

Committing this driving mistake is everything wrong with America. Wait your turn, because IT'S COMING IN LITERALLY A COUPLE SECONDS, GODDAMMIT.

3. Drifting into another lane.

See #17, about doing something else when you're driving. It's not that hard to keep your car between the lines if you're paying attention, unless you can't actually see the lines, in which case there's a larger problem at hand.

2. Driving right on the lane markers, so nobody is sure if you're merging without a turn signal, or you just don't your boundaries.

You confuse everybody.

1. Tailgating.

Whenever someone tailgates me, all I think is, "Tailgate me all you want, bitches, or move lanes." Then I cackle silently to myself and watch their blood pressure rise.