Over the past week, I decided to ask some of my friends about things they thought that had no purpose. Keep in mind some of these are silly and were the first thing that came to their mind. However, I do have to say that for every objected that was thought to serve no purpose also came with a reasonable excuse. so here they are:
1. Gnats and mosquitos and ants and really just most bugs
We’re not really sure why gnats and such exist other than to annoy us by flying around our heads and delightfully dotting our legs with pesky itchy bumps. We even tried to think of a reason they might help the environment (ya know? like how bee’s pollinate flowers) but no such thing was found.
2. College education
This is a bit on the more serious side of things. We questioned our college education simply because not everyone needs one to be successful. There are plenty of people in this world that have gotten a lot farther than probably any of us will without ever having to step one foot into a college lecture. However, we know that college is important and this idea might have been brought up purely on a desperate moment of “college sucks. I want to quit.”
3. Hand sanitizer
Uh yeah, it cleans your hands but only 99.9%!! What about the .1%?!?! I guess there is a point to hand sanitizer but we all know that the company who makes this germ-free goo cannot guarantee that all of the germs on our hands are gone. And for that reason alone, GermX has no purpose.
4. Grape flavoring
The only grape flavored thing you should ever put in your mouth is an actual grape. That’s all. No further explanation.
5. Brown M&Ms
Can we just talk about the fact that there are six different color m&ms and all of them taste the same? What is the point? I mean yes the color adds a bit of fun but if you like m&ms, you would probably still like them if they were all brown.
6. Hair
Okay when someone first mentioned the fact that hair had no purpose, I kind of gave them a look. But after hearing this person out, I had to agree. Yes, hair keeps your noggin warm but it is so annoying to keep up with. Having hair is like having a child, you have to put a lot of effort in it to make sure it looks alive…even though it is literally dead cells. so we came to the conclusion that we’re not really sure why hair is needed. I would also like to add that if all of us were bald life would be just be so much more strange and exciting.
7. Revolving doors
I’m convinced that the only point of a revolving door is so that Hollywood filmmakers can make us wish we had one to spin around in every now and then. Other than that, why don’t we just use normal doors? And for real question: can wheelchairs and the like actually fit in a rotating door? Are these glass spinners up to code?!? LET ME KNOW!
8. Brussel sprouts
No. One. Likes. Brussel. Sprouts. Why. Do. They. Exist?
9. Polaroid cameras
Okay, yes, I have one and I feel super retro and cool when I use it and the pictures are always super cute and stuff. BUT THAT IS NOT THE POINT…because if we really think about it at one point in time Polaroid cameras were the actually only cameras that could print out a physical copy of your picture. And well now we just use them to take a picture and then take a picture of the picture we took with the Polaroid camera and then post it to Instagram…yeah wut?
10. Above ground pools
Look I don't know how you feel, but they don’t make sense. I feel like an above ground pool limits you from swimming as much as you could in an in-ground pool.
11. Belly button rings and also tongue piercings
I guess you say that no piercings really have a purpose but out of all of them these two have to be the least understandable. No one ever sees your belly button ring unless you live in your bikini all year round. And don’t even get me start with on tongue piercings. Well wait…just one question or three…does it affect the way you talk? does It get infected? did it hurt?
12. Social media
This is a deep one, and complicated, because technically what I’m writing on is a social media platform. Yes, for the most part, social media is used to get information across from one person to another. What we really meant when we said that social media had no point is that social media brings a lot of unnecessary issues in our life along with all the information it provides. We just don’t get that or need it for that matter.
13. Littlest Pet Shop
Littlest Pet Shop was created for parents who did not want to get their child an actual pet. And that is a shame. Who wants a tiny miniature plastic dog with an unusually large head that eats paper brown squares that will eventually be spilled all over the carpet?!
14. Small t-shirts
This has to be the most sorority girl answer I got, but I thought it was important. The size small should not exist and to be honest, we're not really sure why it does... Well other than for children. Even if you fit in a small t-shirt, we all know that you get a medium or even a large because a shirt that makes you feel like you can engulf your whole body in it is by far the best thing ever. point. blank.
15. Vests
It is like a jacket without sleeves. It warms your body but leaves your arms cold…why?
16. The tiny pocket in Nike shorts
All I can say is that you might hold your dignity in that small pocket after you have bought your 60th pair of Nike shorts…we all know that's about the only thing that would fit in it anyway.
