If you live in New York you know exactly how ruthless it can be being a driver here. If you're not from here, you've probably been ran off the road before and for that I'm... not sorry, I hope it taught you to speed up, Maryland! They say if you can drive here, you can drive anywhere. Here's 24 cardinal rules to driving in New York (and the surrounding area).
1. Never use a turn signal. It's inconvenient and as far as I'm concerned, unnecessary.
2. Always go above 70 in the left lane! If not, you don't belong.
3. Speaking of the left lane, when you're in it but you need to get off the next exit, don't worry, just cut across 4 lanes. I promise you'll make it.
4. Don't forget that if there's no close spots you can always use the fire lane. I'm sure your large Smart Water is enough to put out a fire in case one happens anyway.
5. And never drive down the rows in a parking lot when you can just cut across the whole thing. It definitely saves a lot more time.
6. The best time to check your texts and other social media is when you're first in line at a red light.
7. If someones going too slow you should send them a message by riding their ass. It's the only way, don't even go around them, stand firm and make your point.
8. If you see a long line for a turning lane, you don't have to wait! Pretend you didn't see it and at the last second squeeze your way in there. I really don't think anyone will care.
9. That also goes for merging. Never merge where it's convenient. Go to the front, you got places to be.
10. Don't bother fixing your crooked park. The person next to you is probably skinny enough to fit, it's okay.
11. If you're ever in traffic on the LIE, just jump in the HOV solo for a bit. Everyone does it! No big deal.
12. When exiting any sort of sporting event, concert, crowded event, etc, always remain glued to the car in front of you to the point where you basically rear ended them twice.
13. You should definitely eat while driving. It's so much more convenient than eating at home.
14. And just never leave the house if you drive a small car because SUVs will ruin your life.
15. Don't even look when you reverse! That's what back up cameras are for, just fly out of that driveway!
16. If the person in front of you is taking too long to merge just go out from behind them! It will give them encouragement to step up!
Of course there's so many more rules but these are the most important and hopefully they'll help you to survive in the concrete jungle and it's outer boroughs, upstate and Long Island.
