15 True Things Every Utahn Knows
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Politics and Activism

15 True Things Every Utahn Knows

From fry sauce to awkwardly named towns, Utah has it all.

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15 True Things Every Utahn Knows
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Life in Utah is unlike anywhere else. We're surrounded by mountains to the north, deserts to the west and red rock paradise to the south. Additionally, we've grown to have a culture and lifestyle apart from any other in this country. Here's 15 statements every Utahn knows to be true, and every perspective visitor should take note of:

1. Mormonism is a part of everyone's life.

A lot of our local culture is based around the most prevalent religious tradition in our area: The Church of Jesus Christ and the Latter Day Saints. Known more often as the LDS Church or Mormonism, they were the first pioneers to settle in the Utah territory. Now, they make up about 60% of the general population in the state. Being in Utah, whether you're Mormon or not, is it's own little adventure into the religion. It's all around, from the Book of Mormon found in every bedside stand in a hotel to the strict liquor and gambling laws found statewide. Hey, we're all a little more informed and diverse because of it.

2. Navigating can be a trick to learn.

Salt Lake City, and most of the surrounding areas, base the street names off of which direction and how many blocks they are from the central Mormon Temple. Each street grows in increments of 100, and it goes until you reach the next grid in the next town. For instance, if you're nine blocks to the east and five blocks to the south of the Salt Lake Temple then you're on 900 East and 500 South. Streets go in all four directions, so you can get any mashup of east, west, south or north directions.

The trick is knowing the lingo. Since Salt Lake is a growing city the numbers have gotten pretty large. Nobody wants to say they live on 12800 South, so we abbreviate to 128th. So the address from above would actually be spoken as "9th East and 5th South." Once you master that, then you can learn to exceptions to the rule. Until then, just ask a friendly Utah face when you need to find Bangerter Highway, Foothill Drive or State Street.

3. Sundays are reserved for family and church, and there isn't much to do (about it).

Everything is closed on Sunday, and I mean everything. This includes all of our State Liquor Stores. Make alternative plans ahead of schedule, buy some board games and be sure to stock up on all the booze you might need to get through the last day of the weekend unscathed.

4. Don't force us to say our T's...

Utahn's are known for having a rather pesky habit of not saying our T's. When we say we're "going to the moun'an" just assume we mean mountain and move on. Similarly, words like Layton become Lay'un. It's a nasty habit, but one that's hard to rip away from a whole state.

5. ... and we won't make fun of you when you can't say our town names.

Utah has never run out of creativity, and our town names will surely prove that. Tooele, for instance, is pronounced too-ill-ah. Juab goes against everything learned in a Spanish class and insists we call it joo-ab. Hurricane, a favorite stop for anyone heading to southern Utah, is pronounced her-a-cun. Runner's up in the 'Weirdest Name' contest include: Duchesne, Koosharem, Heber, Kanab and La Verkin. Oh, and who could forget the neighboring towns of Fillmore and Beaver, who together form the world's best accidental sex joke.

6. Oh, and our children's name's are pretty good too...

Besides the stereotype of the large Utah family unit (which holds to be shockingly true too) we have a knack for naming our flocks of kids strange and unique names.

It's a running joke for locals. For example, using the chart above pick a chunk of name from column A, then mash it together with another chunk from column B! You've got yourself an instant Utah name. Add in random capitalizations as desired, and then tack on a traditional Utah last name (like Jensen, Smith or Young) to complete the effect.

This would be a harmless jest, except every Utahn knows at least one Brynlee or Kyler...

7. Fry sauce.

Ask any Utah local and they'll point you in the direction of their favorite place to get fry sauce. It's a simple mix of ketchup, mayo and spices, but it's had Utahns infatuated since its invention. It's commonplace to hear "someone go grab us from fry sauce" in restaurants statewide, but the second you cross the border into any other state no one will know what you're talking about.

8. Steakhouse vs. Stake house

We have both variations in Utah, but one meeting place is considerably more religious. It's a joke as old as time, but be careful when you ask where the nearest "stake" can be found. You might find yourself in the parking lot of an LDS Church instead of LongHorn Steakhouse.

9. The Salt Lake airport welcome level is a pretty predictable place...

On any given day, the Salt Lake City International Airport is usually packed with families waiting to welcome Elder's and Sister's home from their LDS missions. Mormon's typically leave at 18 years old and return home when they're 20, so tearful reunions are commonplace in our airport. Just as common are signs that say "welcome home Elder" or "welcome home Sister."

10. Don't wear a red "U" in Provo.

And definitely don't wear a blue "Y" in Salt Lake City. Brigham Young University and the University of Utah have been bitter rivals since their first football game in 1896. Every year, in fact, there's a "Holy-War" football game where the traditionally Mormon BYU team and the more secular Ute's team duke it out to see who's the best. It's a bloodbath, and certainly one where no one has problems choosing sides.

11. We don't skip class.

We slough it instead. In Utah skipping something is referred to as "sloughing" the activity. You'll still be marked absent, but you're probably prepared to "take that slough."

12. We can't buy lottery tickets, but we still find a way to play.

It's pretty common for families to make a road trip out of buying lottery tickets, since gambling is technically illegal in Utah. Depending on where you live in the state you might take a journey on over to our neighbors in Wyoming, Idaho, or perhaps Nevada.

13. Pie and Beer Day: a true holiday.

On July 24th, Utahn's celebrate Pioneer day. It's a Mormon holiday recognizing the struggle of pioneers to find their way to, and survive in, wild Utah. However, non-Mormon's use it as a way to get around the state's strict anti-firework laws, and as an excuse to eat plenty of pie and consume plenty of beer.

14. We've got one unforgettable state song.

"Utah! People working together

Utah! What a great place to be.
Blessed from Heaven above.
It's the land that we love.
This is the place!

Utah! With its focus on family,
Utah! Helps each child to succeed.
People care how they live.
Each has so much to give.
This is the place!
"

There's four more versus AND a chorus where that came from, and I highly recommend listening to the whole thing performed live.

15. This is the place.

When the first Mormon's arrived in Utah, their leader, Joseph Smith, declared that "this is the place." Now, we have a legitimate heritage site called "This Is The Place" and it's full of free ice cream, statues of your favorite LDS icons and, if you're lucky, a petting zoo. You can even rent parts of it out for weddings and high school dances...bonus!

If a LDS Heritage Site doesn't sound like your cup of tea, there's always "The Other Place." It's the world's most wonderful greasy spoon/late night diner in downtown Salt Lake City and a favorite stomping ground for the less religiously tied.

There's something for everyone in this lovable state out west.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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