Today I went skydiving. That’s right, I was pushed out of the open door of a tiny airplane from 1,800 feet and sent hurtling down towards the earth strapped onto a perfect stranger. Unsurprisingly, a lot of weird thoughts pop up when you’re preparing to jump out of a moving plane. Here’s just a few of them.

1. One Less Thing For My Bucket List!?

Because most people are a little basic (sorry), you, one, have a bucket list, and two, have skydiving on it. So, when you finally decide to do it, you can’t help but feel a little accomplished as you prepare to cross something off the most important list of all; The List of Life.

2. I Can’t Wait For The Bragging Rights!

That being said, a lot of people will refuse to go skydiving. Afraid of heights or just skeptical of something reeking of adrenaline-inspired mayhem, you’ll forever think of them as chickens. Skydiving gives you the chance the pronounce your bravery and adventurousness to the world and more importantly, to mock chickens.

3. Wait, This Is a Little Stupid.

But maybe the chickens were right. At a certain point, you’ll probably start to wonder who in their right mind pays good money to be tossed out of a fully functioning aircraft? You start to wonder if maybe you should re-think this "bright idea".

4. I Could Die Up There.

Maybe it’s the noise of chickens clucking in your ear, or maybe it’s death calling. You start to wonder about the proportion of people that have died skydiving. I mean, chances are not everyone has an “optimal” landing.

5. At Least It's Not My Fault...

You can, if your Tandem diving, take comfort in the fact that most of the big decisions will be made for you. Someone else straps and tightens your harness, someone else pulls the parachute and at least in my case, I lifted up my legs as someone else figured out how to land. Despite what the waiver said, even if I had died, it wouldn't have been my fault.

6. Who Decided This Was a Viable Idea Anyway?

Honestly, who thought that they would charge people money to have them jump from a plane? Who found and utilized this market? Did it come before or after roller coasters? Who was the first crazy customer? Why do people still do this crazy sh--t?

7. All Things Considered,This Is a Pretty Good Way To Die!

Nonetheless, if you’re going to die eventually, it might as well be falling at hundreds of miles per hour while pretending you're Superman and accidently spitting in your own face.

8. This Could Be My Last…Everything.

You start to wonder if this will be the last time you sleep in your bed, see the sunrise, or tease to your best friend. You believe you must cherish these last sweet moments before they, like your sanity when you agreed to do this, flutter away.

9. I’m Being Overdramatic

So maybe you’re not going to die. Maybe the statistical chances are really low, this is a respectable organization and you have a larger chance of dying in an automobile. Maybe you didn’t need to write a will. Besides, no one would have wanted your prized collection of awkward postcards anyway.

10. Screw It, This Is Going to Be Awesome!

Now that you’ve finished freaking out (for now) you can appreciate how cool this experience is going to be. You, for about a minute and a half, will get you confuse the living daylight out of every flying animal as you, a mere human, soar through the sky. Giving evolution a huge slap in the face, you take to the clouds because honestly, screw thumbs. Wings would have been better.

11. This Is Really Happening.

Somewhere during the moment when I actually swiped my debit card ensuring that I was either going to get in a plane and jump down or I was going to waste a significant portion of my monthly paycheck, I realized this was real. No turning back, no regrets, only consequences, and memories.

12. Are Those... Loose Screws?!?!

As you ride up in the plane you begin to do an unconscious, or obsessively conscious, inspection for all the reasons you’ll probably die. Loose screws, faulty hinges, a loud beeping noise the crew doesn’t seem to be familiar with. Hey, at least you already have parachutes.

13. This Must Be the Coolest Job In The History of Ever.

Someone, namely these awesome people surrounding you, gets paid to do this every day. How? I couldn’t tell you, but at some point, everyone thinks this must be the greatest fluke of mankind. No one should get paid to have this much fun.

14. This Jump Could Change My Life Forever

As you soar over the trees and lakes of Tampa Florida, or wherever you happen to be diving, you start to think that this experience might really change some things. Maybe it’ll make you braver, realizing that you can find real beauty in the path most people tell you to run from. Or maybe, you’ll find a real appreciation for nature specifically from a bird's eye view. Maybe you’ll just learn to love the feeling of your feet safely on the ground.

15. I Made It. Now I Can Do Anything.

You’ve hit the ground. You fell for a while through the air and you hit the ground and lived to tell the tale. Not many people can say that. How hard could finals possibly be?