When I tell people that "500 Days of Summer" is my favorite movie, they usually respond in disbelief: "Why? The main characters don’t end up together.”
Though Tom (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) and Summer (Zooey Deschanel) are an adorable couple, in the end, it just was not meant to be. The fact that they fell in love, but did not end up together is reason I love this film. No, I’m not a cynic when it comes to relationships. Instead, I appreciate this movie because it strays from expectation. It provides a realistic perspective about the highs and lows of dating, and provided viewers with these 14 important lessons on dating.
1. Indecision is a decision.
It's simple: if someone is unsure about you from the beginning, you will get hurt. You can't force someone to like you.
2. You can hate your ex, but still want them to be happy.
It’s a weird and inexplicable feeling. Even if you hate someone, there is always going to be a small part of you that hopes they re okay.
3. Getting over someone is a long, difficult process.
A broken heart or broken plates? Probably both.
4. Date someone who has good taste in music.
"I love The Smiths!"
5. Date someone who makes you laugh.
6. Don't let your happiness depend on someone else.
If you pour all of your time and energy into a relationship, you can lose yourself in the process.
7. Don't date your coworkers.
Just don't.
8. It's okay to grieve after a breakup.
Grieving is a normal, healthy, and necessary part of the breakup process. At some point though, you must force yourself to move on.
9. Find your passion.
Tom's passion for architecture eventually helped him cope with his breakup. Find your passion -- writing, music, sports, anything -- and use it to find strength in any scenario.
10. You can fall in love with someone who isn't right for you.
"Just because some cute chick likes the same bizarro crap you do, that doesn't make her your soulmate." - Rachel, Tom's 12-year-old sister
11. We romanticize the good times after a breakup.
This makes it harder to get over someone, even if the relationship wasn't working out. Focusing only on the good times stunts our ability to move on.
12. Just because you see an ex again, doesn’t mean that you’re going to get back together.
Don't get too excited. If you broke up in the first place, there's probably a reason for it.
13. It all works out in the end.
In the end, every relationship is a learning experience. Don't let one relationship destroy your chance at happiness.
14. Have faith that you'll meet someone new.
When you're ready, the right person will come along.
