14 Reasons Why Dan Humphrey Isn't Gossip Girl

14 Reasons Why Dan Humphrey Isn't Gossip Girl

Just a few of the hundred reasons why people are still shaking their heads at the "Gossip Girl" finale.

Okay, I'll admit itmy obsession with "Gossip Girl" is a little excessive. But, after re-watching the series four times, I have deemed myself an expert, and my expertise tells me there is no possible way Dan Humphrey can be gossip girl. There are hard facts in several of the episodes proving this point.

1. Season 1, Episode 6: The Handmaiden’s Tale

Just as Dan and Serena are trying to figure things out (for the first time), Dan is caught off guard when he reads a Gossip Girl post that Serena is on the market for a Masked Ball date and impulsively decides to show up and surprise her. Sure Lonely Boy might be a mighty good con artist, but what does he gain by pretending to be surprised by a newly released Gossip Girl post when he’s sitting in his kitchen alone?

2. Season 1, Episode 13: A Thin Line Between Chuck and Nate

Things between Dan and Serena have finally started to heat up (making those of us who are team Nate gag), when Gossip Girl leaks a picture of Serena buying a pregnancy test. Dan not only looks like he is going to vomit when Jenny shows him the post, but also comes to the realization that he loves her at the surprising thought of her being pregnant. Now, if that’s not enough to convince you, let’s take a second and acknowledge the fact that no 18-year-old boy in his right mind would send a picture of his girlfriend buying a pregnancy test to his entire school.

3. Season 2, Episode 1: Summer, Kind of Wonderful

Serena and Nate manipulate Gossip Girl into thinking that they are dating to cover up Nate’s affair with a married woman. First off, Dan is angry when he sees Nate and Serena kissing at the White Party (a hoax that got all of us a little too excited). Not to mention, there are also about 366,932 reasons why Dan Humphrey wouldn’t volunteer the information that things heated up between Nate and Serena over the summer, the fact that he’s trying to win Serena back when the blast is posted being the main one. If Dan were actually Gossip Girl, the power move would be to release that the relationship is a cover-up, rather than to draw attention to it.

4. Season 2, Episode 3: The Dark Night

It’s a new school year, and Dan and Serena are officially back on, only this time Dan doesn’t want anyone to know. They haven’t talked about the reason they broke up in the spring (Georgina), and Dan doesn’t want to have to explain it to his dad when he doesn’t know where the relationship is heading himself. But his reluctance to make the relationship public doesn’t stop him from kissing Serena passionately in the middle of New York City. Surprise! Someone snags a photo and sends it into Gossip Girl, but if Dan were so against telling their family and friends, why would he post a photo that outed them to the entire Upper East Side?

5. Season 2, Episode 9: There Might Be Blood

Ah, the first of Jenny’s many dramatic pleas for attention. Jenny escapes when she’s grounded to put on a fashion show, you know just normal 15-year-old girl stuff. Rufus and Dan are going mad trying to figure out where she might have gone. In the midst of their search, Dan opens the computer to Gossip Girl to see a picture of Nate and Jenny kissing at The Palace. This leaves Dan confused as to why Nate and Jenny are kissing, but relieved to know she is safe. Would a frantic brother really take the time to send a blast gossiping about his sister instead of viewing the information and immediately telling his father so they can get to her as fast as they can?

6. Season 2, Episode 9: There Might Be Blood

Yet another blast proves that Dan isn’t Gossip Girl in this episode. While Dan and Rufus are looking for Jenny, a blast is sent out that a high school girl, Muffy, has lost her virginity. Gossip Girl posted this as a favor to Blair and Chuck who sent this in to get the young girl that Blair is watching to throw in the towel in her race to lose her virginity before her friends. Not only is Dan not on good terms with either Chuck or Blair at this point in the series, but this also raises the question: why would Dan keep sending blasts when he’s worried sick searching for his sister?

7. Season 2, Episode 15: Gone With the Will

Lilly and Rufus have a love child, say wha? This unfortunate news surfaces right after Dan and Serena get back together (round three), and nothing says awkward like sharing a sibling with your girlfriend. Rufus breaks the news to Dan and Jenny, who both decide to keep it to themselves, or themselves and Vanessa. A snooping classmate witnesses Dan telling Vanessa and steals his phone when he’s in the heat of the moment. After reading through Dan’s texts, his classmate sends the juicy news about Lilly and Rufus to Gossip Girl. Serena spent the episode trying to figure out why Dan was acting so weird, suspecting he was cheating. This blast confirmed she had a reason to be suspicious, but proved to Serena there is some things are more awkward than catching your boyfriend cheating, like sharing a sibling with him. Dan Humphrey would never send this blast—not only because of his loyalty to his father because also because of how much it complicates his relationship with Serena. And let’s be real, their relationship was complicated enough before they threw in a half-brother.

8. Season 2, Episode 17: Carrnal Knowledge

You’d think after hiding a sibling from Serena, Dan would be on his best behavior, but yet again Gossip Girl takes the opportunity to sabotage their relationship when Dan messes up. Serena has a new teacher who is young, pretty and has the hots for Dan. Dan begins to get close with her while trying to balance his relationship with Serena. Dan and Ms. Carr are on the stairway to an inappropriate relationship when Gossip Girl jumps the gun and posts that Dan is sleeping with a teacher. Let’s just take a second. Dan Humphrey wants to jeopardize his own reputation, tarnish Ms. Carr’s career, and destroy his relationship with Serena, so he uses his alter ego, Gossip Girl to do it? Right. Makes sense.

9. Season 3, Episode 8: The Grandfather: Part II

Dan has put Serena on the back burner for a little, but that doesn’t mean he stuck the drama back there with her. Dan has gotten himself tangled in a relationship with movie star Olivia Burke (portrayed by Hilary Duff) and is struggling to keep up with the lifestyle. Sure, Olivia’s cute, smart, and down to earth, but she’s still a celebrity. She appears on Jimmy Fallon and accidently shares an embarrassing story about Dan. Dan missed the original airing of the episode, and Olivia goes out of her way to prevent him from seeing it. But in the world of Gossip Girl, there are no secrets, and inevitably, a blast is posted. Although Olivia stole Dan’s phone and deleted the blast, he still ends up seeing the blast and is visibly hurt when he sees it. So first, he’s pretending to be surprised when he finds out Serena needs a date for the ball, and now he’s surprised to see his girlfriend humiliate him on national television? Please stop with the mind games, Dan Humphrey.

10. Season 4, Episode 10: Gaslit

Serena has a wild past, but growing up on the Upper East Side with a less than concerned mother and an absent father, who can blame her? Although she has been clean since her return from boarding school, her peers have been anxiously awaiting her relapse. Dan is the only person who has always been in her corner. And if you haven’t already guessed, Dan and Serena are spending this episode trying to figure out their relationship. Yawn—haven’t we already been there? But this time, there’s a twist. Serena has made an enemy who is trying to frame her for a drug relapse, and Dan is the only one who is adamant on the fact that she doesn’t need rehab. So Dan and Serena are dancing with the idea of getting back together, and he’s trying his best to convince everyone she doesn’t need to go to rehab, but he posts a picture of her snorting cocaine on Gossip Girl? Can we agree that this boy has some seriously messed up morals?

11. Season 4, Episode 11: The Townie

Serena’s back in rehab, and Dan, Blair, and Nate have figured out who did it. Juliet Sharpe believes Serena is the reason her brother is behind bars, and she’s determined to make her pay. Although Dan and company have enough detective skills to figure out what Juliet’s up to, they can’t seem to figure out where she is. Dan’s solution? Email Gossip Girl. Normally I wouldn’t argue with that tactic seeing as how Gossip Girl knows all, but what is good is emailing yourself going to do? The worst part is that Gossip Girl responds with an address. C’mon now. Who can make sense out of this one?

12. Season 4, Episode 19: Petty in Pink

Dan and Serena are over. Dan and Blair are best friends. Blair's dating a prince. Seriously, what’s going on? Blair’s relationship with the prince is forbidden. The only way it will work out is if Blair can convince Louis’s royal handler that she is dating someone else. Reluctantly, Dan agrees to stage a private intimate moment in front of the handler. The only way Dan agrees to do it is if Blair promises Serena won’t find out. But, much like every other secret on this show, Gossip Girl gets her hands on footage of Blair and Dan’s staged kiss—and gasp—releases it. Yet another time when Gossip Girl posts something Dan is desperately trying to keep a secret. No man is willing to compromise his dignity that often.

13. Season 5, Episode 3: The Jewel of Denial

Dan wrote a novel, and Vanessa submitted it to a publicist. Dan should be thrilled, right? Wrong. This entire novel is based off the vicious secrets and his true (insulting) opinions of his peers on the Upper East Side. Seeing as how these are the people Dan spends all of his time with, he’s desperate to kill the publication. He resorts to Blair’s scheming tactics to figure out who the publisher is. Dan becomes even more frantic when Gossip Girl begins to release information about the author of "Inside." So, Dan wrote a book. He doesn’t want anyone to know he wrote this book. He also posts information about it to all of his friends who he is trying to hide it from. Math certainly isn’t my strong suit, but something about that definitely doesn’t add up.

14. Season 5, Episode 13: G.G

Blair’s dream (or pretend dream, because we all know her true dream is to marry Chuck Bass) is coming true. Blair is about to marry into royalty. But there’s no such thing as a Gossip Girl wedding that is drama free. Blair is marrying Louis, but both Chuck and Dan are pining after her, a step up from a love triangle. Blair’s wedding is interrupted by a Gossip Girl blast. Everyone’s phone is buzzing with a video of Blair confessing her love to Chuck while wearing her wedding gown. Okay, maybe Dan posted the video because he’s in love with Blair and will do anything to stop her from marrying Louis. But Dan is standing on the altar as a groomsman when the video was released. A groomsman who takes down the bride in the middle of her royal wedding? That’s a little extreme, even for you, Dan Humphrey.

If this doesn't convince you that Dan isn't Gossip Girl, I'm not sure what will. I don't know about you guys, but I'm still convinced that it should have been Dorota.

Cover Image Credit: giphy.com

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I'm The Girl Without A 'Friend Group'

And here's why I'm OK with it


Little things remind me all the time.

For example, I'll be sitting in the lounge with the people on my floor, just talking about how everyone's days went. Someone will turn to someone else and ask something along the lines of, "When are we going to so-and-so's place tonight?" Sometimes it'll even be, "Are you ready to go to so-and-so's place now? Okay, we'll see you later, Taylor!"

It's little things like that, little things that remind me I don't have a "friend group." And it's been like that forever. I don't have the same people to keep me company 24 hours of the day, the same people to do absolutely everything with, and the same people to cling to like glue. I don't have a whole cast of characters to entertain me and care for me and support me. Sometimes, especially when it feels obvious to me, not having a "friend group" makes me feel like a waste of space. If I don't have more friends than I can count, what's the point in trying to make friends at all?

I can tell you that there is a point. As a matter of fact, just because I don't have a close-knit clique doesn't mean I don't have any friends. The friends I have come from all different walks of life, some are from my town back home and some are from across the country. I've known some of my friends for years, and others I've only known for a few months. It doesn't really matter where they come from, though. What matters is that the friends I have all entertain me, care for me, and support me. Just because I'm not in that "friend group" with all of them together doesn't mean that we can't be friends to each other.

Still, I hate avoiding sticking myself in a box, and I'm not afraid to seek out friendships. I've noticed that a lot of the people I see who consider themselves to be in a "friend group" don't really venture outside the pack very often. I've never had a pack to venture outside of, so I don't mind reaching out to new people whenever.

I'm not going to lie, when I hear people talking about all the fun they're going to have with their "friend group" over the weekend, part of me wishes I could be included in something like that. I do sometimes want to have the personality type that allows me to mesh perfectly into a clique. I couldn't tell you what it is about me, but there is some part of me that just happens to function better one-on-one with people.

I hated it all my life up until very recently, and that's because I've finally learned that not having a "friend group" is never going to be the same as not having friends.

SEE ALSO: To The Girls Who Float Between Friend Groups

Cover Image Credit: wordpress.com

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The Football World Loses One Of Its Finest Players

Bart Starr passed away and NFL players, coaches, and fans all mourn the loss of the Packer legend, but his life and career will live on in hearts of Packer nation forever.


Bart Starr passed away at the age of 85 in Birmingham, Alabama. The NFL lost a great player. The Green Bay Packers lost a hero. And, the world lost a true gentleman. Starr's legacy has surpassed his accomplishments on the gridiron. He inspired not only his peers but the generations that have come after him. He is — and always — will be remembered as a Hall of Famer, a champion, and a Packer.

Bart Starr was a Packers legend. Starr led Green Bay to six division titles and five world championships. As the quarterback of Vince Lombardi's offense, he kept the machine going and executed the plays like no other. His mastery of the position was a large part of the Packers success in the 1960s. Starr was also the perfect teammate for the perfect team. His leadership put him in command of the Packers. Starr's time in Green Bay will not be forgotten by former players, coaches, and the fans.

Bart Starr's resume is rivaled by few in NFL history. He played in 10 postseason games and won 9 of them. He led the Packers to victory in Super Bowls I and II and won the MVP award in both games. He was the MVP of the league in 1966 and was named to the NFL All-Decade Team of the 1960s. The Packers retired his number 15 and Starr has been inducted into the Packers and Pro Football Hall of Fame.

After his playing days, Starr would become the head coach of the Packers. He could not repeat the success he had on the field from the 1960s teams. His coaching years do not take away from his legacy as one of the all-time great Packers. Starr was inducted into the Pro Football Hall of Fame in 1977.

One of Starr's last visits to Lambeau field was on a cold November night in 2015. Starr and his wife attended a ceremony in which the Packers retired Brett Favre's jersey number. Starr was the perfect personification of what it meant to be a Packer. His most heroic moment came in the 1967 NFL Championship Game. The Ice Bowl came down to a third and goal in Lambeau Field's south endzone against the Dallas Cowboys. Starr came to the sidelines and bravely told Vince Lombardi that he can sneak it in for a game-winning touchdown. Lombardi then replied, "Run it, and let's get the hell out of here." Starr ran a quarterback sneak for the game-winner and the Packers were off to Super Bowl II. Without Starr, Green Bay would not have won a second straight Super Bowl. His leadership in big game moments will live with Packers fans for a lifetime.

Vince Lombardi: A Football Life - The Ice Bowl

Starr leaves behind his wife Cherry, his son, and three granddaughters. Packers fans will have a tight grip on the memories Bart Starr and the 60s teams created. Starr left behind a template for being a Green Bay Packer. He also left a template for being a good man and a gentleman of the game of football. He was a competitor and a leader. Packer nation mourns for the loss of one of the finest human beings the game has seen.

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