It's that time of year again. The purge of the clothes begins.
For some reason, this is the prime time to clean out closets. Parents are going to buy their children brand new clothes for school, so they get rid of the ones their children have outgrown or don't want anymore. College kids are moving back and realize there's a shirt they bought their freshman year of high school hanging up in their closet -- purge that sucker! It's a dreaded time for some. We all have the same questions when cleaning out our closets.
1. Do I really have to clean out this closet?
Yes, you really do. Just do it. Do it. Do it.
2. Why did my mom buy this for me?
You know we all think it. We wonder why our mom bought us that tube top from Wal-Mart or the way too small shirt from Dirt Cheap that has a hole in the armpit. She was just being nice, right?
3. Better yet, why did I buy this for myself?
That shirt that I thought was cute isn't so cute anymore... someone send help!
4. I wonder if these shoes still fit?
Who am I kidding? I bought these in seventh grade. I'm a junior in college now! But wait... maybe they do still fit? Ha, nope.
5. Should I keep this shirt or donate it?
I mean, it's a little old, but I could wear it for ugly days or to the bar so my good clothes don't smell like smoke. I don't know. I should probably donate it. Ugh. I can't decide.
6. I know I had a shirt, where is it?
Oh, there it is. In my sister's closet.
7. Do I really, and I mean really, need this handbag?
Of course the answer is yes! You can never have too many handbags. I mean, you can, but... let's just pretend you can't. Keep that thing.
8. Would my sister/cousin like this outfit?
Who am I kidding? She stole my shoes a couple of months ago and never gave them back. Forget it. [Throws outfit in Goodwill pile.]
9. Oh, oops. There's Sally's shirt she swore up and down I had.
I could've sworn we stayed at her house when I borrowed this shirt. Maybe we stayed at mine? But I thought I gave it back to her? Maybe I didn't. Oops.
10. But whose pants are these?
Are these Sandra's? Maybe they're Ashley's. Wait. I think these are Sally's, too. I don't know. Send help again, please.
11. Also, when did I even wear these?
I can't remember when I wore these! Was it Homecoming? Maybe to the movies? No, I remember. I wore them to that party a couple of years ago. No, wait. I wore them yesterday. Who owns these pants and when did I wear them?!
12. Maybe Mom will let me keep the rest of the clothes so I don't have to finish the rest.
Ha. Who am I kidding? She's gonna make me do my sister's closet or clean out my shoes. It never ends.
13. [Hears Mom yell to do the shoes.]
I told you it would never end.
It's dreadful, we hate it and we don't want to continue cleaning out our closets! Hire someone to do it next time, Mom. I'll gladly show them my Instagram so they know what I wear.
