Sometimes a spider sighting can turn a 20-something running back to mama, begging her to fight that battle for you. Plenty of times I've done exactly that (there was pointing and tears, obviously), while my Mom and Dad reached up and wadded up the spider in toilet paper like it was nothing. You end up telling yourself that next time you won't impose, that you can buck it up and be that strong, too. That is, until the next spider comes around and you're back on that wheel. Here's 11 signs that spiders are you're mortal enemy and your most horrific fear!
1. You avoid places where you think there might be spiders, i.e.: the basement, attic space, closets, etc.
2. You sometimes watch "Survivor" and think, “Yeah, I could totally do this. Wimps.”
But then, of course, as soon as you see the way too up close and personal shots of a spider or a challenge with eating the creepy-crawler, you decide that now’s not your time—you’re too good for that show.
3. You wake up from nightmares about a spider paranoid that there’s one somewhere in bed with you.
4. You’re totally independent and awesome until you see a spider.
Then, suddenly you’re extremely dependent on your mom, dad, family member, significant other, neighbor, random person who’s creepy but not as creepy as the spider.
5. You see a spider and smash and smash and smash until you’re sure it’s dead, and then you smash some more.
Every other bug your probably release back out into the wild, but you don’t think spiders deserve that kind treatment.
6. You fall for the fake spider trick. Every. Single. Time.
7. You’re pretty sure that if they could record your shriek when you see a spider, it’d be a perfect sound splice for a Halloween soundtrack filled with sounds of horror.
But your shriek is probably on an octave that only dogs and small children can hear, so recording it might be difficult.
8. You typically think that in the game of flight or fight, you’re totally a fighter, but against spiders you aren’t.
You’re a flight person. You’ll run fleeing at a speed that rivals the Flash (suddenly if you’re not athletic, you become very athletic) and don’t care who you’ve just subjected to the wrath of your eight-legged foe. Elderly grandma? Cute kitten? They’re better equipped to handle it. Hopefully.
9. You defeat the spider, but know that there’s got to be more out there so you become hyper aware of them.
10. You have only one fear greater than spiders and that’s death, but even then there’s always death by spider...
11. ...or not killing the spider....
