It's not them, it's you.
And you know it - or at least are subconsciously aware of it. But nobody else is. Your family sure doesn't know about your phobia, and your friends probably don't know about it either too. However, your best friend(s), your truest BFF(s), probably know about your fear towards commitment or even the slightest idea of committing to something. Longterm isn't in your vocabulary, or if it is, you most likely don't use that word often in your sentences or in your plans. For you - it's about the present, now, and yourself - which is great! Until you start to get questioned about your love life and the future. But what if, right now, you're reading this and shaking your head 'no?' and thinking, 'But I'm not afraid of commitments - that's not me.'
Well, honey, denial is the first stage towards acceptance, right? Here's a few signs of a commitment phobe to read about and maybe compare yourself to:
1. You are affectionate and loving...until someone brings up either of the two 'L' words: "What do you see us doing in the long run?"
2. You live for the chase...
3. But not for the kill. Because let's face it, you're not ready nor do you see yourself about to...
...for someone so suddenly.
4. It's work over love, or endless goals over love for you. (i.e. traveling the world.) Because in your head, work and things like travel don't seem to confine you like the idea of being in a relationship does.
5. You're more of a 'go-with-the-flow' kinda person. You are more for spontaneous plans than planned outings, and your friends are more or less used to you popping up randomly because of this.
6. It's hard to make plans with you in advance, either because you just really don't plan ahead of time or if you don't like feeling committed to something in the future.
7. Labels? Oh, that's not another 'L' word that sends you running.
8. You tend to store things into different parts of your life.
...and if you can do that, then you share a trait that a lot of commitment phobes tend to have.
9. Your interest tends to fade fast once things get serious - relationship and hobby wise.
10. Feelings are okay - talking about them you can do. Unless they're your feelings.
11. And when asked why you aren't in a relationship yet, you tend to use the same ol' answer(s):
12. Because why do messy, complicated relationships when you can take the less stressful way and do you and life by yourself at your own pace? For you, everyday is:
...day!
*Insert half-hearted laughing and smiling here*
