Isn't it amazing how long some of our parents have been together? No really, imagine being with someone for 20+ years. That's how long my parents and several other couples I know have been together. While still happily in love. Seems almost impossible to us, right? That's because we have a generation focused around relationships goals, flowers, Victoria's Secret presents and material items that we constitute as being the foundation of a meaningful relationship. Then on the other hand, we have people creeping on their significant other's likes and pages just to see what they're up to or if they liked the wrong person's selfie. Seriously... how stupid is that? Maybe our parents made it because they focused on the presence of their partners, not their materials. Maybe if we keep these 11 things in mind, we could make it one day just like them.
1. Stop expecting your gf/bf to buy you ridiculously expensive gifts:
How much money do you have to your name right now? Not a lot, right? If you're a broke college student like me, you have about $7.30 in your bank account at the moment. So why do we expect our significant other to dish endless amounts of money on us? Or more importantly, for material items. Choose someone who devotes their time to you, not their bank account.
2. Constant communication ruins face-to-face conversation:
If your boyfriend and you remain in constant contact all day long, until you see each other in person, then what are you going to talk about? What you two did today? Congratulations, you already told each other that through a text. Saving some communication for when you see each other in person is healthy and keeps things exciting.
3. Being "a psycho girlfriend/boyfriend" is not cute:
I've been on both sides of the spectrum. I've been the psycho and I've dealt with the psycho. There is a strange admiration for this on social media, people claim that it shows the other person "cares about losing you." Let me tell you something: The fastest way to lose someone is to do this. What is "cute" about someone doubting your every move and not trusting you? Always assuming you're up to something? There's nothing cute about it at all. It's unrealistic and you shouldn't be with anyone who doubts you anyway unless you have given them a reason to. In that case, shame on you.
4. It's not OK to ditch any of your friends for your significant other:
Repeat after me: I will not ignore my friends when I get into a relationship. Don't do it. Don't. Don't even think about it. If you are in a relationship with the right person, they will make sure you'e not ditching your other friends for them.
5. Having guy friends/girlfriends in a relationship is OK:
Platonic relationships are common, and your significant other should respect that. If they seem to have a problem with you seeing your guy friends/ girlfriends, then they obviously don't trust you or are too immature to understand how innocent these relationships are.
6. Always say what you really feel:
Hoping the other will pick up on your cues never turns out well, and covering up how you really feel will never help you to grow.
7. Be understanding. We're all busy here:
We all have a lot going on in our lives. If you're with someone understanding to this, they will know what you have to take care of before spending time or talking with them. If someone expects themselves at the top of your priority list at all times, you should cross them off the list entirely.
8. If they wanted to be with someone else, they would be:
People in the past are there for a reason. There is no point to worrying or agonizing over someone in their past when you are their present. Contrary to popular belief, some people are actually over their exes.
9. Relationship goals aren't real. Create your own:
Believe it or not, relationships aren't all about posting a picture together. Or liking each other's selfies or tweets. It's about connecting with someone on a level that you don't share with anyone else. That couple in the picture captioned "relationship goals" is not real, and it's pointless to mimic.
10. Pick someone who will call you out when you're in the wrong:
Substance is key. Substance is attractive. Substance shows that they're not willing to go along with everything you say, or agree to whatever you say to avoid conflict. It also shows individuality and shows that they still can independently think without your approval.
11. Personality will outshine a pretty face every time:
Your character is what defines you as a person, not your looks. Looks don't make you reach out in the middle of the night towards the person you would care to share your 2 a.m. thoughts with.
