1. You’re still a kid.
You’re not going to have it all figured out in college. You came here to learn how to get your life together, and no one expects you to have it perfected the whole time you’re there. You’re going to change your major, drink too much, miss class, miss work, break someone’s heart, have your heart broken, lie in bed all damn day watching Netflix when you have a paper, test, and presentation due the next day. You’re going to be irresponsible and a little bit of a mess, but you’ll get through it and learn how to manage all of your emotions
2. College is not about your GPA.
Graduating 22nd in my class and with a 3.7 GPA, I thought it’d be the same ball game in college: not the case. I was so disappointed when my GPA started dipping, and I couldn’t figure out where I was falling short. It wasn’t until my junior year that I realized the grade I received wasn’t reflective of my intelligence, but rather a measure of my obedience to the syllabus. Aside from a lower GPA, I had a plethora of leadership experience under my belt, an internship, and membership to a developmental organization. I was on a great path, I had no reason to feel like I was performing poorly. You get so much more out of college than a number.
3. If you fall in love, fuck it; it happens.
Man, what to say about this one? So much can be said about why a relationship in college fails, but since everyone’s situation is different, I’ll just say what I’ve learned. Love can happen whenever. Life doesn’t care if it’s the wrong time or the wrong person. When it hits you, you’re in. Don’t be ashamed for allowing yourself to fall. Through every experience, you learn, and what do you know? Some college relationships do end in marriage. For the majority of them that don’t, however, you lived it, you learned, it’s a part of you. Eventually it’ll pass, or at the least the pain will. Focus on developing as a person. It’s OK to include the experience of being in love within that development. Own your experience in its entirety.
4. Your family should be a part of this.
It seems so odd to me that when people go off to college, they forget about their families. I understand that some familial situations aren’t prime, and so there isn’t much to go back to, but I would say stay close to a few meaningful members of your family. You’re going to need them to pull you back when you feel like you’re straying from the core of who you are. College is all about change and development and experiencing new things, but you don’t want it to be a place where you lose yourself. You want to build on who you are, not become a new person.
5. You will graduate.
If I had a dime for every time I thought of dropping out. The worries of potentially not graduating due to class performance, costs, stress, etc. are all real. However, you have to remain positive and remember why you’re there. A lot of the worries we have are self-inflicted. We blow things out of proportion and accept them as our reality when, in actuality, we have the power to view them in a much more positive nature. Control your thoughts and don’t let them wander to places of doubt.
6. The stress you feel is common.
Not to say that it’s normal, because it shouldn’t be, but it is common. The stress you feel is most likely the stress most of your classmates also feel. Even when you have those posers who claim college is a breeze, trust me, they suffer, too. Take comfort in the fact that the stress you feel is shared, and it’s something everyone else is going through. The fact that you feel stress is probably a sign you're doing it right, because it means you have enough going on that you feel like an adult.
7. Independence comes with responsibility.
How corny. This is so cliché, but it’s true. In college, you have so much autonomy over your actions, it’s kind of crazy. You are responsible for your own actions and that’s a big thing to realize. If you don’t know how to take responsibility for what you do, you will most definitely mess up on epic levels. The fear of consequences or retribution come in handy when you’re living on your own and completely for yourself. Enjoy being independent from your home, but keep in mind everything you do is for you to own.
8. Your major is slightly irrelevant.
It matters. You know, it kind of does. There’s a big difference between a double major in accounting and economics and a bachelor's in political science. One is often more valued in the work place than the other. However, you have to keep in mind that everyone is on their own path. With a major in political science, you can go to law school and become a successful international human rights lawyer. Who knows? It’s whatever you want. A lot of it has to do with practicality and finances, but I would encourage everyone to find two hobbies in college: one they love and one that pays. Work with your adviser to construct a degree that blends both.
9. The moments are what matter.
You have to worry about what’s due in the future, and keep track of everything you have to get done, but you can’t be so focused on getting tasks done and meeting deadlines that you forget about people. The people you meet in college, from friends to advisers, are going to provide you with experiences and relationships you will, at the very least, remember. Stay on top of your assignments and do them well, but it's OK to take a break and interact with people.
10. Stop planning so much.
These four years, or five or six, are not do-or-die. You could graduate with a degree in biology and realize you want to do something completely separate from the medical field. It's OK. You’ll figure it out. You may plan on leaving the state, but a situation presents itself that compels you to stay local. You never know what could happen or what you will want in the future. Focus on doing what you can right now. Let today be your victory. Worry about five years in five years: You’ll have the time.
