Steven Markowitz...the man who I so desperately want to be friends with. Or, as most people know him, Hoodie Allen, a talented Long Island rapper whose witty lyrics and catchy beats have been filling my earbuds for years.
Every week I send him a nice little Tweet linking him to my articles...and every week he ignores me. Which is funny because there has been times Hoodie has liked some of my Tweets and even replied back! But I'm hilarious, so why wouldn't he? Click here and you won't be disappointed ;)
Maybe now since I wrote one about him...he'll give it a read, give it a share, hit the follow button or maybe give me some free tickets to his upcoming tour. I mean...how sick would that be?!
1. First off, we're both hilarious.
Sassy, sarcastic, and both have great hair...we're a comedic dream team.
2. I could pose as his girlfriend when the girls are falling all over him and he just can't take it anymore.
I'll bite the bullet and take one for the team...not a problem at all, I promise.
3. He's Jewish.
Although I'm not Jewish, I tend to be attracted towards Jewish men who love their mothers. He could teach this little Shishka the ropes.
4. We have the same favorite movie.
He gets that in some instances, especially when it comes to "The Mighty Ducks," the second movie is better than the first.
5. Hoodie, Ed Sheeran, and I would be the three best friends that anybody could ever have.
Ed could play guitar and Hoodie could rap and I would look super cute while we all sang around a campfire together. Drinking heavily included.
6. I'm a big fan of his music
I've spent countless hours dancing around my room with no pants on listening to his albums.
7. I would take pictures of him while we traveled the world together.
When he invites me along on tour with I'll try not to make fun of him when he asks me to take super touristy pictures.
8. We both put Chipotle before anything else.
The question is Hoodie...burrito or bowl? Guac or no? Do you pay for a drink or just get a water cup? We can discuss.
9. He'd always have somebody to SnapChat silly things to.
There is no SnapChat unanswered...not in my house.
10. We already have a picture together!
11. He totally reads all my articles and is definitely going to share this one...
Right???
