Co-written with Hannah Myers.
With so many stupid people on the Internet today, having to argue with them has become commonplace. It is our job to teach these people about how incorrect their opinions are. Internet denizens, we must remain strong and not relent on our positions. We must comment on every Facebook post, YouTube video and Subreddit! No ignorant tweet should be ignored! It is up to us to right the wrongs of the Internet. As such, the way we have seen so many arguments on the internet go requires us to make some corrections to proper internet argument etiquette.
1. Use as many curse words as you can to emphasize your point.
Using a series of curse words strengthens your argument because it shows how passionate you are about the subject. Profanity also shows your opponent how intelligent you are, so use it often!
2. Use extra question marks to show how confused you are about their moronic post.
Like seriously??? How can someone be so stupid???
3. Any ".com" site is a credible resource.
Your opponent may provide you with links to ".org" or ".gov" sites, but you're clearly better at research because you know that ".com" sites are always a fountain of valid information.
4. Tell a story about yourself.
If it has happened to you, it has happened to everyone. Obviously everyone's life experiences are all exactly the same and definitely applicable in every situation.
5. Always correct your opponent's grammar.
When you think your opponent may have stumped you, reclaim victory by insulting their grammar. Let them know the differences between "there" and "their."
6. Use any -ism or -phobia to shut down your opponent's close-mindedness.
If it goes against what you think is right, your opponent is obviously wrong and must always have some prejudice against you.
7. Take everything your opponent says personally.
Any correction or refutation your opponent makes is just an insult to your intelligence and mind as a whole. Doing this will ensure you have the fire to keep posting replies.
8. Never make a concession.
Even if your opponent is right, don't let them get any ideas. And remember, not replying to their post is considered a concession.
9. Tell your opponent how stupid he or she is.
Constantly reference your opponent's stupidity using words like "moron" and "idiot." Adding a curse word before one of these words really emphasizes how dumb the person is!
10. Abandon all logic.
People that try to bring valid research and objective perspectives into arguments are seriously SO annoying. No wonder "logical" people always stop replying when they know they have lost a fight on the Internet.