Whether you’ve ever worked in the food industry or not, I think we can all appreciate the wonder that is the customer.

1. The Early-Birds

These are the customers who knock on the door of the restaurant before you’ve even had enough time to take off your coat. Although, they’re always the easiest customers to serve because they usually leave before the lunch rush comes in.

2. The Struggling Mother

Having a mother and her three screaming children walk into my restaurant and demand prompt serves is aggravating to say the least. Just because you walk in here with your tennis shoes and a diaper bag does not mean I have suddenly become the babysitter to your three little devils.

3. The Repressed Frat Boy

A guy walks in with two of his closest friends and immediately sits at my table and my first response is to roll my eyes. How will each on them greed me today? Maybe call me darling or sweetie, or even grab my ass just for good luck! That’s always fun!

4. The Demanding Housewife

She walks in wearing a golf skirt and a visor even though everyone damn well knows she only woke up a half hour ago. She orders water, no ice, with a slice of lemon, and a fruit salad without cottage cheese because it’s fattening. She’s a real prize and her only joy in life is being able to order me around for an hour.

5. The Romantic Couple

They won’t stop holding hands across the table or shoving their tongues down each other’s throats when they think I’m not looking. It’s hard enough trying to juggle five tables at once, but now you’re going to make me stand here and listen to the story of how you two met? No thanks!

6. The Cute Old Couple

On the other hand, the cute older couple that likes to come in every Friday and order the same thing are a delight to talk to! They always tip me well and give me hope for the rest of humanity.

7. The Frustrated Father

Wifey stuck you with the kids today, huh? Alright, I’ll go grab you another beer, but I’ll have to confiscate your car keys first.

8. The Giggling Teenage Girls

A group of girls walks into the restaurant and I immediately wish I had asked for the day off. Each is going to order a salad with a soda, and then ask for separate checks and hand me wads of cash from their tiny change purses. Best part!? No tip, because teenage girls think that’s “optional” for some reason.

9. The Asshole

Everything I do is wrong. The soup is too hot, then not hot enough. I put too much ice in the drink, but now everything is watered down. The food isn’t good. The drinks aren’t good. Nothing is good enough for this insane customer!

10. The Late Arrival

We close at 10:00pm and it’s 9:58pm… oh great! You made it just in time! Sit down right here while I go spit into your drinks.